Think the lotus... Feel the lotus...
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Totally insufficient dowry
Here's an un-cliche-ed Christmas post:
Think the lotus... Feel the lotus...
Think the lotus... Feel the lotus...
Saturday, November 24, 2007
Your Friendly Neighbourhood Cop
When you have trouble... Any kind of trouble at all...
Help is only a phone call away.
Help is only a phone call away.
Friday, November 23, 2007
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
The best of collection
Just when you think you've seen it all...
I thought I was the only one with elephant jokes.
When the question sounds hard... Create a new one!
I always tell my students to use A4 single line paper. Here's why...
The answer so ah beng...
Hahahaha! This guy must be born in the 80's!
Sir, apa itu expand?
Expand itu kembangkan lah.
This wan, funny until can die!
This one so so lah... I've seen worse.
Well, if you come to SMK Selayang Bharu, you'll see more...
Finally, the last one...
I thought I was the only one with elephant jokes.
When the question sounds hard... Create a new one!
I always tell my students to use A4 single line paper. Here's why...
The answer so ah beng...
Hahahaha! This guy must be born in the 80's!
Sir, apa itu expand?
Expand itu kembangkan lah.
This wan, funny until can die!
This one so so lah... I've seen worse.
Well, if you come to SMK Selayang Bharu, you'll see more...
Finally, the last one...
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Peperiksaan sudah tamat.. Sila letak pensel...
If you had an extraordinary ability, what would you do with it?
If you had only a little time left, what would you do?
Don't you think that time is running out?
Haven't you heard that the Jews are secretly rebuilding the temple, on which the revelation of end-time events hinge on?
Didn't it occur to you that life is actually one big exam, and what you do with your limited knowledge, with your limited time, on your limited pieces of paper will determine what's going to happen to you for eternity?
Even though I was once a top-notch swimmer, an award-winning lifesaving instructor, a record-setting lifeguard, a national representative to international lifesaving events... I still wonder if I'll ever become like the old man with the fruit baskets.
Didn't it occur to you that even if you were the best at something, keeping it for yourself will amount to nothing?
Therefore, I purposed in my heart to not live like I'm staying. But to live like I'm leaving.
Anda tinggal sepuluh minit... Calon diingatkan mengikat kertas...
If you had only a little time left, what would you do?
Don't you think that time is running out?
Haven't you heard that the Jews are secretly rebuilding the temple, on which the revelation of end-time events hinge on?
Didn't it occur to you that life is actually one big exam, and what you do with your limited knowledge, with your limited time, on your limited pieces of paper will determine what's going to happen to you for eternity?
Even though I was once a top-notch swimmer, an award-winning lifesaving instructor, a record-setting lifeguard, a national representative to international lifesaving events... I still wonder if I'll ever become like the old man with the fruit baskets.
Didn't it occur to you that even if you were the best at something, keeping it for yourself will amount to nothing?
Therefore, I purposed in my heart to not live like I'm staying. But to live like I'm leaving.
Anda tinggal sepuluh minit... Calon diingatkan mengikat kertas...
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
The problem with celery...
... Is that when you buy it, it comes in a whole bunch. If you're cooking for yourself, it takes days to finish. And if you want to finish it before it rots, you'll have to eat celery everyday for the next 5 days.
What's for lunch? Celery with carrots and mushrooms. What's for dinner? Celery with carrots and mushrooms. What's for lunch tomorrow? Do you have to ask...
My blood pressure is gonna be so low, if you chop off my arm, my blood will trickle out in small droplets so slowly, you'll think my system does not run on blood.
I think I've become addicted to cooking. I wanna cook all the time! It's so weird. Maybe it's because I'm the type that naturally likes to plan. So it's fun to make plans for every meal, and execute them! I get to be the boss, and nobody gets to argue, disagree, or stand in the way. Hahaha. Boss. Hugo Boss...
It's interesting that I started out as a total nincompoop in cooking. Now, it has become... may I shamefully admit... my hobby! I'll earn my kid's vote as dad of the year next time.
Anyway, here are some tips for people who want to teach nincompoops how to cook. Coming from first-hand experience. From former nincompoop, to teacher, to other teachers who want to teach nincompoops.
1. Do not use phrases like "add salt to taste".
You must understand that "add salt to taste" makes no sense to a beginner. How much salt will make food too salty? How much sugar will make food too sweet?
You'll say, "Add according to your taste lah." But how will we know? Will one teaspoon of salt do the trick? Or two teaspoons? How will I know how much salt I need to achieve "my taste"? Do you even know what is "my taste"? How is "my taste" quantifiable?
Therefore, quantify what you say. For example, "Half a teaspoon of salt will be good enough for any average person for the dish that you're cooking now." That will be very helpful.
2. Do not give instructions like "dice the onions" or "chop the garlic".
To a beginner, words like "dice" or "chop" makes no sense. Dice means dadu, that 6-sided cube thing. Chop means chicken chop, that piece of western food thing.
When you ask a beginner to dice the onion, it is best to show him once by exemplification. Cut the onion into half, slice the onion into thin slices first, then cut the thin slices into small cubes. Then only it will make sense. Show the steps that lead to the end product, and the size of the end product. Then, he will register the verb "dice" into his vocabulary.
When you ask a beginner to chop garlic, know that it makes no sense to him either. Give an example, show the steps, then show the end product. He will register "chop" into his brain.
3. A beginner has no concept of fire control.
Know that to a beginner, a fire is a product of combustion between hydrocarbons and oxygen. Period. He does not know that different fire intensities need to be used to cook different kinds of food. He thinks that the bigger the fire, the faster the food will cook, thus the faster he gets to eat and forget all his problems. That, my friend, is every beginner's philosophy. Learn it well.
You have to tell a beginner the correct fire intensities for the correct cooking equipment. For example, non-stick pans must be used under slow fire. Or else, the non-stick surface may get scraped off into your cooking.
You also must tell him the correct fire intensities for the correct kinds of food. For example, vegetables must be cooked over low fire, meat in high fire. If you cook a vegetable over high fire, you may "kill" the vegetable. If you cook meat over low fire, you cannot "kill" the meat. Which one is easier to kill? Vegetable, or cow? Use your blain, use your blain!
Conceptualize, exemplify, rationalize. Standard procedure for teaching any concept under the third level of the Bloom Taxonomy: Application.
4. Never make any assumptions that a beginner understands anything you say.
Murphy's Law always happens to a beginner: What can go wrong will go wrong! Know that the vocabulary you use in the kitchen may mean a totally different thing to a beginner. Do not assume that he is equipped with basic understanding of how the "laws of the kitchen" work.
Understand this as a rule of thumb:
a) If you don't tell... He will do! For example. You did not tell him that oil and water do not mix in a hot wok. You did not tell. He will wash the spatula, and put wet spatula into the hot oil. You'll get atom bomb reaction.
b) If you tell... He may not do! For example. You tell him to boil the rice. He will put the rice into the rice cooker. He will turn on the main electrical socket. But he will not press the "on" button on the rice cooker. You will finish cooking everything else, serve everything on the dining table... And stare at disbelief at the rice.
There are many more tips I can think of. Will write more next time. Good chefs are hard to find. Good teachers are even harder to come by.
Happy cooking. And happy teaching the nincompoops!
What's for lunch? Celery with carrots and mushrooms. What's for dinner? Celery with carrots and mushrooms. What's for lunch tomorrow? Do you have to ask...
My blood pressure is gonna be so low, if you chop off my arm, my blood will trickle out in small droplets so slowly, you'll think my system does not run on blood.
I think I've become addicted to cooking. I wanna cook all the time! It's so weird. Maybe it's because I'm the type that naturally likes to plan. So it's fun to make plans for every meal, and execute them! I get to be the boss, and nobody gets to argue, disagree, or stand in the way. Hahaha. Boss. Hugo Boss...
It's interesting that I started out as a total nincompoop in cooking. Now, it has become... may I shamefully admit... my hobby! I'll earn my kid's vote as dad of the year next time.
Anyway, here are some tips for people who want to teach nincompoops how to cook. Coming from first-hand experience. From former nincompoop, to teacher, to other teachers who want to teach nincompoops.
1. Do not use phrases like "add salt to taste".
You must understand that "add salt to taste" makes no sense to a beginner. How much salt will make food too salty? How much sugar will make food too sweet?
You'll say, "Add according to your taste lah." But how will we know? Will one teaspoon of salt do the trick? Or two teaspoons? How will I know how much salt I need to achieve "my taste"? Do you even know what is "my taste"? How is "my taste" quantifiable?
Therefore, quantify what you say. For example, "Half a teaspoon of salt will be good enough for any average person for the dish that you're cooking now." That will be very helpful.
2. Do not give instructions like "dice the onions" or "chop the garlic".
To a beginner, words like "dice" or "chop" makes no sense. Dice means dadu, that 6-sided cube thing. Chop means chicken chop, that piece of western food thing.
When you ask a beginner to dice the onion, it is best to show him once by exemplification. Cut the onion into half, slice the onion into thin slices first, then cut the thin slices into small cubes. Then only it will make sense. Show the steps that lead to the end product, and the size of the end product. Then, he will register the verb "dice" into his vocabulary.
When you ask a beginner to chop garlic, know that it makes no sense to him either. Give an example, show the steps, then show the end product. He will register "chop" into his brain.
3. A beginner has no concept of fire control.
Know that to a beginner, a fire is a product of combustion between hydrocarbons and oxygen. Period. He does not know that different fire intensities need to be used to cook different kinds of food. He thinks that the bigger the fire, the faster the food will cook, thus the faster he gets to eat and forget all his problems. That, my friend, is every beginner's philosophy. Learn it well.
You have to tell a beginner the correct fire intensities for the correct cooking equipment. For example, non-stick pans must be used under slow fire. Or else, the non-stick surface may get scraped off into your cooking.
You also must tell him the correct fire intensities for the correct kinds of food. For example, vegetables must be cooked over low fire, meat in high fire. If you cook a vegetable over high fire, you may "kill" the vegetable. If you cook meat over low fire, you cannot "kill" the meat. Which one is easier to kill? Vegetable, or cow? Use your blain, use your blain!
Conceptualize, exemplify, rationalize. Standard procedure for teaching any concept under the third level of the Bloom Taxonomy: Application.
4. Never make any assumptions that a beginner understands anything you say.
Murphy's Law always happens to a beginner: What can go wrong will go wrong! Know that the vocabulary you use in the kitchen may mean a totally different thing to a beginner. Do not assume that he is equipped with basic understanding of how the "laws of the kitchen" work.
Understand this as a rule of thumb:
a) If you don't tell... He will do! For example. You did not tell him that oil and water do not mix in a hot wok. You did not tell. He will wash the spatula, and put wet spatula into the hot oil. You'll get atom bomb reaction.
b) If you tell... He may not do! For example. You tell him to boil the rice. He will put the rice into the rice cooker. He will turn on the main electrical socket. But he will not press the "on" button on the rice cooker. You will finish cooking everything else, serve everything on the dining table... And stare at disbelief at the rice.
There are many more tips I can think of. Will write more next time. Good chefs are hard to find. Good teachers are even harder to come by.
Happy cooking. And happy teaching the nincompoops!
Monday, October 22, 2007
Eeyer... Terah...
Here's a story about Terah.
Terah begot Abram. Terah was Abram's father.
Teah died. Abram went to Canaan. When there was a famine in Canaan, Abram took his wife, Sarai and went to Egypt.
Abram told his wife to say that she was his sister, because Sarai was very beautiful. He was afraid that the Egyptians may kill him and her away. If the Egyptians believed that she was related to Abram, he might be treated well for Sarai's sake.
The plan worked. The Pharaoh of Egypt showed favour to Abram. Pharaoh gave him sheep, oxen, male donkeys, male and female servants, female donkeys, and camels.
However, Pharaoh's house got struck with great plagues because of Sarai. When Pharaoh found out that Sarai was actually Abram's wife, he gave Sarai back to Abram and asked them to go away, along with all that they had. Abram left Egypt richer than before he came (Genesis 12:10-20).
Abraham (formerly known as Abram) repeated the same stunt again in Gerar. He fooled Abimelech, the king of Gerar into believing that Sarah (formerly known as Sarai) was his sister, for his own protection. And again, it worked.
When Abimelech found out about it, he questioned Abram why he did such a thing.
Just when you thought he would just tell the truth, Abram dared to say it wasn't a lie! He said "But indeed she is truly my sister. She is the daughter of my father, but not the daughter of my mother; and she became my wife" (Genesis 20:1-13)
Eeyer... What a liar...
I thought long and hard...
I thought maybe I have misread it...
I checked my commentary...
The commentary confirmed it: "The marriages of the family of Terah were very close. In this patrician society, the marriages of close relatives was regarded as a sign of rank. Abraham and Sarah apparently agreed that she would invoke the plea that she was his sister wherever they might happen to be."
EEYER!! LIKE THAT ALSO CAN??
So, I thought again...
Oooh... So, Terah had more than one wife! How many wives did he really have?
I tried to think where I can check that out....
I found Terah's genealogy in Genesis 11:27-30. ..
No record of polygamy there!
Wow! Imagine... If Abraham had not leaked out that little piece of info to Abimelech, we wouldn't have known that his father had more than one wife!
Hmmm... So, I wonder...
How many wives did Terah have?
Dunno. Nobody knows... Bible doesn't say...
Hmmm... Then, I wonder again...
Why did Terah have more than one wife?
Ah, this one no need to think so long! It's because...
Dia adalah lelaki! Hahaha!
Terah begot Abram. Terah was Abram's father.
Teah died. Abram went to Canaan. When there was a famine in Canaan, Abram took his wife, Sarai and went to Egypt.
Abram told his wife to say that she was his sister, because Sarai was very beautiful. He was afraid that the Egyptians may kill him and her away. If the Egyptians believed that she was related to Abram, he might be treated well for Sarai's sake.
The plan worked. The Pharaoh of Egypt showed favour to Abram. Pharaoh gave him sheep, oxen, male donkeys, male and female servants, female donkeys, and camels.
However, Pharaoh's house got struck with great plagues because of Sarai. When Pharaoh found out that Sarai was actually Abram's wife, he gave Sarai back to Abram and asked them to go away, along with all that they had. Abram left Egypt richer than before he came (Genesis 12:10-20).
Abraham (formerly known as Abram) repeated the same stunt again in Gerar. He fooled Abimelech, the king of Gerar into believing that Sarah (formerly known as Sarai) was his sister, for his own protection. And again, it worked.
When Abimelech found out about it, he questioned Abram why he did such a thing.
Just when you thought he would just tell the truth, Abram dared to say it wasn't a lie! He said "But indeed she is truly my sister. She is the daughter of my father, but not the daughter of my mother; and she became my wife" (Genesis 20:1-13)
Eeyer... What a liar...
I thought long and hard...
I thought maybe I have misread it...
I checked my commentary...
The commentary confirmed it: "The marriages of the family of Terah were very close. In this patrician society, the marriages of close relatives was regarded as a sign of rank. Abraham and Sarah apparently agreed that she would invoke the plea that she was his sister wherever they might happen to be."
EEYER!! LIKE THAT ALSO CAN??
So, I thought again...
Oooh... So, Terah had more than one wife! How many wives did he really have?
I tried to think where I can check that out....
I found Terah's genealogy in Genesis 11:27-30. ..
No record of polygamy there!
Wow! Imagine... If Abraham had not leaked out that little piece of info to Abimelech, we wouldn't have known that his father had more than one wife!
Hmmm... So, I wonder...
How many wives did Terah have?
Dunno. Nobody knows... Bible doesn't say...
Hmmm... Then, I wonder again...
Why did Terah have more than one wife?
Ah, this one no need to think so long! It's because...
Dia adalah lelaki! Hahaha!
Friday, October 19, 2007
Why I cannot become angkasawan
I dunno how many of you watched the live video-conferencing between our angkasawan and our Prime Minister on TV a few days ago. Our angkasawan was seen pulling out a piece of aluminium foil. Inside it was a copy of the Rukunegara. He read it in space.
Not being enough, he also reached behind him and pulled out an emblem signifying our 50th year of independence. He showed it in space.
The first time our Rukunegara is read beyond the earth's atmosphere! The first time a Malaysian goes into space during our significant 50th year of independence!
How symbolic. Very inspiring.
I thought to myself. What would I have done if I was there in outer space?
I would reach behind me in the zero-gravity room... Struggle to pull out an aluminium foil,... Open it, and read...
"Dato' Seri... Ini Article 11, Dato' Seri... Saya mau baca... This will be the first time all mankind will know about it..."
*Prime Minister and his wife start squirming in their seats on national television. TV station starts to cut transmission*
"Nanti, nanti... Ada lagi, Dato' Seri... I have a message for our young, aspiring angkasawans..."
*Prime Minister and wife resettle into their seats. Tries to smile*
"I am very bangga and berterima kasih because I diberi peluang to be the first Malaysian in outer space. I bertekad untuk inspire our younger generation untuk participate in space program and research. This time, we have to use a Russian rocket. But I hope that next time, we will have the technology, and we can build our own rockets..."
*Reach backwards clumsily, pull out this emblem*
Liao... I shall reside in Russia indefinitely.
Not being enough, he also reached behind him and pulled out an emblem signifying our 50th year of independence. He showed it in space.
The first time our Rukunegara is read beyond the earth's atmosphere! The first time a Malaysian goes into space during our significant 50th year of independence!
How symbolic. Very inspiring.
I thought to myself. What would I have done if I was there in outer space?
I would reach behind me in the zero-gravity room... Struggle to pull out an aluminium foil,... Open it, and read...
"Dato' Seri... Ini Article 11, Dato' Seri... Saya mau baca... This will be the first time all mankind will know about it..."
*Prime Minister and his wife start squirming in their seats on national television. TV station starts to cut transmission*
"Nanti, nanti... Ada lagi, Dato' Seri... I have a message for our young, aspiring angkasawans..."
*Prime Minister and wife resettle into their seats. Tries to smile*
"I am very bangga and berterima kasih because I diberi peluang to be the first Malaysian in outer space. I bertekad untuk inspire our younger generation untuk participate in space program and research. This time, we have to use a Russian rocket. But I hope that next time, we will have the technology, and we can build our own rockets..."
*Reach backwards clumsily, pull out this emblem*
Liao... I shall reside in Russia indefinitely.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Hooonesty, is such a lonely word...
I had nasi lemak for breakfast today. The bill came up to RM14.60. I paid the Indonesian cashier RM20.60. She gave me back two RM5 notes and an RM1 note.
I told her she counted wrong, and returned her an RM5 note.
Sometimes I wonder is it still worth it to be honest. In the real word, the golden rule is unilateral. No matter how honest you are, you cannot expect the same to be done to you.
Let me tell you why I think the golden rule is unilateral.
1. Remember the guy who banged my car from behind? Up till today, he maintains that the police has not decided to summon him yet. I made a good, clean police report. And he's trying to lie his way out from paying for my insurance claim.
2. I was given a RM200 voucher from Brothers for a car window tint. I showed the guy the voucher. I said I wanted a tint worth around RM400. He showed me a tint worth RM450. To cut the long story short, he gave me a Sun-Good window tint, put a V-Good sticker on the rear window, and charged me RM450. Actually, the real price of the tint was RM650. The RM200 voucher makes it reduced to RM450.
And I later discovered that Sun-Good and V-Good tints are both ciplak brands. The really good one is V-Kool.
3. My kitchen sink got blocked. The plumber came to remove the blockage. Nothing was replaced. The plumbing costed RM120.
There are many things I could've done in return.
1. Since I have the guy's name, IC number and address, I could send him poison pen letters every birthday, new year, and Deepavali.
2. Since the Brother's tint shop is just nearby, I could drive there, wind down my heavily tinted windows, and "PTUIIII!!!" Then drive away.
3. I could walk downstairs and cut out the plumber's phone number from all his posters in my neighbourhood. So no one from Taman Bandar Baru Selayang will ever call him again.
Is it because I'm too lurus bendul? Is it because Chinese who can't speak the Cantonese dialect are more prone to con jobs? Or is it because I am incapable of lying?
Somehow I feel that lying is one of the most annoying and damaging sins a person can commit. Annoying, because the person who gets fooled will feel really stupid. Damaging, because it seriously tears apart your integrity... Something very easy to destroy and very difficult to repair.
I have a student in my class. Let's call him G. He is a prefect, clean shaven, bespectacled, and he doesn't look like a thug at all. But I've heard stories of how he sabotaged and won a Tamil competition, and how repeatedly cheated in exams.
I pray for a chance to confront him on his lying character. Dudes like him think that everybody lies, lying is a norm, and lying is a legitimate practice, as long as nobody catches you.
We look at laws back then, and we look at them now. The law is much more complicated today, because people in the past have found ways to lie through it or manipulate it.
The civilization of a nation is supposedly reflected by how well-developed its laws are. The more developed its laws, the more civilized the country is.
On the other hand, a nation with " highly developed" laws also goes to show that many people have found ways to get around those laws before. Therefore, the law is not really a representation of how civilized a nation is. Instead, it mirrors how crooked it actually was, and is!
Hence, I put it to you that the system we live in is not built for people who need it to live. Rather, it is caused by, or built around, the people who live to destroy it.
Once, a girl who came and sat in my class. Let's call her A. She said she was from a different class, but she wanted to learn Add Maths. She said she had her teacher's permission to sit in, but she did not want to say who. I sniffed out who her form teacher was, and when I uncovered her plot of skipping classes... I called her in, gave her a lesson she will never forget, which also served as an object lesson for all the students in my class:
Cikgu Joshua is nice. But he tolerates no liars. Even if you don't believe in God, believe that Cikgu Joshua won't let you off as long as he has breath.
She dares not to look me in the eye again. Because she knows I have seen through her. It is difficult for her to be transparent before someone who cares about integrity.
Ah, well... Here's to the few lurus benduls left in the world... Even when you get conned to your last cent, always remember... Billy Joel still loves you.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgmJ1miBzek
I told her she counted wrong, and returned her an RM5 note.
Sometimes I wonder is it still worth it to be honest. In the real word, the golden rule is unilateral. No matter how honest you are, you cannot expect the same to be done to you.
Let me tell you why I think the golden rule is unilateral.
1. Remember the guy who banged my car from behind? Up till today, he maintains that the police has not decided to summon him yet. I made a good, clean police report. And he's trying to lie his way out from paying for my insurance claim.
2. I was given a RM200 voucher from Brothers for a car window tint. I showed the guy the voucher. I said I wanted a tint worth around RM400. He showed me a tint worth RM450. To cut the long story short, he gave me a Sun-Good window tint, put a V-Good sticker on the rear window, and charged me RM450. Actually, the real price of the tint was RM650. The RM200 voucher makes it reduced to RM450.
And I later discovered that Sun-Good and V-Good tints are both ciplak brands. The really good one is V-Kool.
3. My kitchen sink got blocked. The plumber came to remove the blockage. Nothing was replaced. The plumbing costed RM120.
There are many things I could've done in return.
1. Since I have the guy's name, IC number and address, I could send him poison pen letters every birthday, new year, and Deepavali.
2. Since the Brother's tint shop is just nearby, I could drive there, wind down my heavily tinted windows, and "PTUIIII!!!" Then drive away.
3. I could walk downstairs and cut out the plumber's phone number from all his posters in my neighbourhood. So no one from Taman Bandar Baru Selayang will ever call him again.
Is it because I'm too lurus bendul? Is it because Chinese who can't speak the Cantonese dialect are more prone to con jobs? Or is it because I am incapable of lying?
Somehow I feel that lying is one of the most annoying and damaging sins a person can commit. Annoying, because the person who gets fooled will feel really stupid. Damaging, because it seriously tears apart your integrity... Something very easy to destroy and very difficult to repair.
I have a student in my class. Let's call him G. He is a prefect, clean shaven, bespectacled, and he doesn't look like a thug at all. But I've heard stories of how he sabotaged and won a Tamil competition, and how repeatedly cheated in exams.
I pray for a chance to confront him on his lying character. Dudes like him think that everybody lies, lying is a norm, and lying is a legitimate practice, as long as nobody catches you.
We look at laws back then, and we look at them now. The law is much more complicated today, because people in the past have found ways to lie through it or manipulate it.
The civilization of a nation is supposedly reflected by how well-developed its laws are. The more developed its laws, the more civilized the country is.
On the other hand, a nation with " highly developed" laws also goes to show that many people have found ways to get around those laws before. Therefore, the law is not really a representation of how civilized a nation is. Instead, it mirrors how crooked it actually was, and is!
Hence, I put it to you that the system we live in is not built for people who need it to live. Rather, it is caused by, or built around, the people who live to destroy it.
Once, a girl who came and sat in my class. Let's call her A. She said she was from a different class, but she wanted to learn Add Maths. She said she had her teacher's permission to sit in, but she did not want to say who. I sniffed out who her form teacher was, and when I uncovered her plot of skipping classes... I called her in, gave her a lesson she will never forget, which also served as an object lesson for all the students in my class:
Cikgu Joshua is nice. But he tolerates no liars. Even if you don't believe in God, believe that Cikgu Joshua won't let you off as long as he has breath.
She dares not to look me in the eye again. Because she knows I have seen through her. It is difficult for her to be transparent before someone who cares about integrity.
Ah, well... Here's to the few lurus benduls left in the world... Even when you get conned to your last cent, always remember... Billy Joel still loves you.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgmJ1miBzek
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
More than a woman
Some changes have been coming over me...
I find it disturbing...
These are the things that I want for Christmas...
Tell me if I should be worried...
If I were a Friends character, I'm turning into a Monica Geller!
Now, off to chopping garlic... Must store them in a container...
Check out the dance moves... Love it!
I find it disturbing...
These are the things that I want for Christmas...
A non-stick pan.
A kitchen knife set.
A plastic chopper board.
Tell me if I should be worried...
If I were a Friends character, I'm turning into a Monica Geller!
Now, off to chopping garlic... Must store them in a container...
Check out the dance moves... Love it!
Monday, October 08, 2007
Upward Christian teachers, climbing up to war...
Who said there is no career advancement in the teaching profession? Let me show you the way to the top.
First, take the Penilaian Tahap Kecekapan (PTK) exam. Pass that exam, can jump one step higher up the rung.
Next, aim for Anugerah Guru Cemerlang. Get that award, can jump another step higher.
Then, take Masters in Education.
After that, follow through to PhD.
Having a Masters or PhD won't make you jump any higher up the rung. But a string of academic credentials will come in handy (because that is all we can have) if you want to:
After that, enter politics.
Then, win the elections.
Then, become Menteri Pelajaran Malaysia (or Timbalan also can. Because probably the Timbalan may be the guys doing all the real work. Dato' Seri Hishammuddin has two Timbalans working under him. Dato' Hon Choon Kim and Dato' Noh b. Omar.)
Then after that, take over the world.
But first...
Before my meteoric rise to the top...
One thing is inevitable...
Must...
Pass my SPP interview first.
Bah.
Where to find coat ah... How to become Datuk like that... Chey.
And I still love my bicycle...
(They say if we pass the SPP interview, we must sign the AUKU form, which prohibits us from actively participating in politics. Then, how do people in the government sector become cabinet ministers? Confused...)
First, take the Penilaian Tahap Kecekapan (PTK) exam. Pass that exam, can jump one step higher up the rung.
Next, aim for Anugerah Guru Cemerlang. Get that award, can jump another step higher.
Then, take Masters in Education.
After that, follow through to PhD.
Having a Masters or PhD won't make you jump any higher up the rung. But a string of academic credentials will come in handy (because that is all we can have) if you want to:
- Aim for a position in the Pejabat Pendidikan Daerah, or...
- Aim for a position in the Jabatan Pendidikan Negeri, or...
- Get a post in the Kementerian Pendidikan Malaysia.
After that, enter politics.
Then, win the elections.
Then, become Menteri Pelajaran Malaysia (or Timbalan also can. Because probably the Timbalan may be the guys doing all the real work. Dato' Seri Hishammuddin has two Timbalans working under him. Dato' Hon Choon Kim and Dato' Noh b. Omar.)
Then after that, take over the world.
But first...
Before my meteoric rise to the top...
One thing is inevitable...
Must...
Pass my SPP interview first.
Bah.
Where to find coat ah... How to become Datuk like that... Chey.
And I still love my bicycle...
(They say if we pass the SPP interview, we must sign the AUKU form, which prohibits us from actively participating in politics. Then, how do people in the government sector become cabinet ministers? Confused...)
Sunday, October 07, 2007
Livin' la vida loca
How do you spend a weekend when you have time to spare and cash in hand?
Got time? Check. Got all night.
Got cash? Check. Tuition boy just paid his 2-months' worth of fees.
Got car? Check. Freshly washed and waxed in the morning.
Got mall? Check. The best hang-out place in town...
Shopping? Check. Litter pedal dust bin. Giant Super Tempatan Rice. Pisces pork luncheon meat. Nikko sliced mushroom. AAA straw mushrooms. Yeo's chicken kurma. Sunstar chicken curry with potato. Alishan pickled lettuce. Ita corned beef. Building baked beans. Felton outer space bottle. Giant potato. High class shopping, man...
"Happy feeling" drink? Check. My new addiction...
Movie? Check. Rented from Sri Gombak's Speedy Video for RM3...
Go home? Check. Watched The Skulls on my laptop while munching on nuts and drinking Malta.
Hangover? No check. Next morning, can go to church.
Livin' la vida loca with Cikgu Joshua. Guaranteed no parental objections.
- Go down town with a shiny car.
- Shop till you drop at a mall.
- Have a drink that will give you a "happy feeling".
- Watch a movie.
- Come home.
- Wait for a hangover.
Got time? Check. Got all night.
Got cash? Check. Tuition boy just paid his 2-months' worth of fees.
Got car? Check. Freshly washed and waxed in the morning.
Got mall? Check. The best hang-out place in town...
Shopping? Check. Litter pedal dust bin. Giant Super Tempatan Rice. Pisces pork luncheon meat. Nikko sliced mushroom. AAA straw mushrooms. Yeo's chicken kurma. Sunstar chicken curry with potato. Alishan pickled lettuce. Ita corned beef. Building baked beans. Felton outer space bottle. Giant potato. High class shopping, man...
"Happy feeling" drink? Check. My new addiction...
Movie? Check. Rented from Sri Gombak's Speedy Video for RM3...
Go home? Check. Watched The Skulls on my laptop while munching on nuts and drinking Malta.
Hangover? No check. Next morning, can go to church.
Livin' la vida loca with Cikgu Joshua. Guaranteed no parental objections.
Monday, October 01, 2007
Nut man
"You should join NUT," said Andrew's mother.
"Huh, whassat?"
"NUT. The other day, the NUT man came to our school to hand out their newsletter."
Oooh... She must've met this guy...
At RM5/month, you can be a member of NUT. National Union of Teachers. They will deduct RM5 from your gaji every month.
Interesting...
Many people have responded differently to what I purposed to do. Some say it's not wise to antagonize the hand that feeds you. Some say wait until the interview results are out before taking action. Some say, that's the way to go! Some say it's crazy.
I say... When 12 people went to spy the Promised Land, 10 people came back and said it was crazy. Only 2 people said it was possible for the taking. One was Caleb. The other was Joshua son of Nut... I mean, Nun.
I'm of the opinion that social justice and righteousness is more important than merely having a paycheck under your name every month. If we, being in the government service, the ones who witness such things first hand, choose to remain silent and do nothing... Who will?
We are not responsible Malaysians if we choose to bend, just to protect our self interests. The call for government servants is to be a servant of the people. Not a servant, period. There is a big difference.
A servant of the people does what is best for the people and its government. A servant licks its master's shoes for breadcrumbs.
How much more we, who are servants of God.
"Huh, whassat?"
"NUT. The other day, the NUT man came to our school to hand out their newsletter."
Oooh... She must've met this guy...
At RM5/month, you can be a member of NUT. National Union of Teachers. They will deduct RM5 from your gaji every month.
Interesting...
Many people have responded differently to what I purposed to do. Some say it's not wise to antagonize the hand that feeds you. Some say wait until the interview results are out before taking action. Some say, that's the way to go! Some say it's crazy.
I say... When 12 people went to spy the Promised Land, 10 people came back and said it was crazy. Only 2 people said it was possible for the taking. One was Caleb. The other was Joshua son of Nut... I mean, Nun.
I'm of the opinion that social justice and righteousness is more important than merely having a paycheck under your name every month. If we, being in the government service, the ones who witness such things first hand, choose to remain silent and do nothing... Who will?
We are not responsible Malaysians if we choose to bend, just to protect our self interests. The call for government servants is to be a servant of the people. Not a servant, period. There is a big difference.
A servant of the people does what is best for the people and its government. A servant licks its master's shoes for breadcrumbs.
How much more we, who are servants of God.
Thursday, September 27, 2007
SPP Interview Expose
Copy this article, post it in your blog, and circulate it around. You may know the guy to whom this incident happened.
I was at Jabatan Perdana Menteri on 25th July 2007 for an 8:00 a.m. interview with the Suruhanjaya Perkhidmatan Pelajaran. It was an interview to confirm my placement into the government service as DG41.
The interview letter didn’t state anything about attire. The SPP website stated "baju kemeja berlengan panjang dan bertali leher." See http://www.spp.jpm.my/temuduga-faktor.php. I wore my grey slacks, dark blue long-sleeve shirt, and a silver tie.
Upon arrival at Bilik Temuduga 10, we were told by our room's interviewer that we need to wear a coat.
Nobody brought any coats from our room. We went out to search for a coat. Around 5 other guys in the entire interview had coats. So we borrowed their coats and passed them around.
When my turn came, I put on the coat and went in.
Right after I said "Selamat pagi Dato," he asked me where I got the coat from. I said I borrowed it. He said how come I don't even own a coat. I said the interview letter did not state that I have to wear a coat, or else I would've found one before I came. He scolded me and said I did not know how to interpret the letter.
He asked what kind of pants I was wearing. I said my grey slacks. He said how can that be formal. I said only have 2 pairs of slacks. One black, one grey. The black one, I wore to school on Monday, and now it is being washed. So, today I'm wearing my grey slacks.
He threw my documents aside and chased me out of the room.
He called me in again after a very long time. It wasn't an interview. It was a dressing-down, humiliation session. He didn't really ask me anything much. Here's the gist of what he said:
"Bapa kamu tahu tak, kamu seluar hanya ada dua? Kalau dia tahu, dia malu tak, anak dia macam ini?"
I said hidup saya susah. I explained my family background. And why I have banyak tanggungan.
"You are wrong!! Saya pun tak pernah tanggung orang macam itu. You must change the way you live."
He looked at my shoes, and he said, "Kasut kamu tak gilap."
I said I cycle to school everyday. How to gilap?
"COME ON... YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT!!"
Well, if I don't have a car, and my school is nearby, what's wrong with cycling to school?
"Kamu pakai baju apa itu. Cina tak boleh pakai gelap."
I said I'm a Christian, I don't abide by such superstitions. I said by the way, my shirt is blue. Not black.
"Kamu bukan Cina kah? You must be proud to be a Chinese... Malaysian Chinese..."
What does he know about being a Malaysian Chinese? We don't get Datukships and awards like him. We can't afford to be wearing designer clothes like him. We are not supported by the government's silver spoon in our mouth from the day we were born. We have to struggle to take care of our families. What does he know?
He said, "Dalam PIPP, ada dinyatakan kita harus memartabatkan profesion keguruan. Apa yang kamu faham tentang itu?"
That is the Teras Kelima in the Pelan Induk Pembangunan Pendidikan. I explained that according to the PIPP blueprint, we are supposed to upgrade the intake system of teachers and improve the working environment of teachers. I wasn't taking rubbish. That was the textbook answer.
He said, "Tak payah, tak payah. Kalau untuk kamu saja, macam mana?"
I said, "Kena memperbaiki imej, kalau menurut Dato."
He said "Gaji satu bulan berapa? Pergilah beli seluar..."
He even stood up to show me his slacks. He said a pair that costs seratus lebih would be a good one.
I cycle to school everyday. My shoes aren't shined. I can't afford a pair of slacks that cost over a hundred bucks. I don't have a coat. I guess I'm not fit to be a teacher.
Well, if they can pay me 4 grand a month, certainly the profession guru's martabat will be dipertingkatkan, isn't it?
If what I wear matters so much more than how I teach, then my workplace should not be in a musty classroom. I should be on the catwalk runway.
Here is the Dato’ that should be brought to the public’s attention.
http://www.alumnisas.com.my/asas/asasgmbr/dato%27HjAbdullah.jpg
************************************************
I was at Jabatan Perdana Menteri on 25th July 2007 for an 8:00 a.m. interview with the Suruhanjaya Perkhidmatan Pelajaran. It was an interview to confirm my placement into the government service as DG41.
The interview letter didn’t state anything about attire. The SPP website stated "baju kemeja berlengan panjang dan bertali leher." See http://www.spp.jpm.my/temuduga-faktor.php. I wore my grey slacks, dark blue long-sleeve shirt, and a silver tie.
Upon arrival at Bilik Temuduga 10, we were told by our room's interviewer that we need to wear a coat.
Nobody brought any coats from our room. We went out to search for a coat. Around 5 other guys in the entire interview had coats. So we borrowed their coats and passed them around.
When my turn came, I put on the coat and went in.
Right after I said "Selamat pagi Dato," he asked me where I got the coat from. I said I borrowed it. He said how come I don't even own a coat. I said the interview letter did not state that I have to wear a coat, or else I would've found one before I came. He scolded me and said I did not know how to interpret the letter.
He asked what kind of pants I was wearing. I said my grey slacks. He said how can that be formal. I said only have 2 pairs of slacks. One black, one grey. The black one, I wore to school on Monday, and now it is being washed. So, today I'm wearing my grey slacks.
He threw my documents aside and chased me out of the room.
He called me in again after a very long time. It wasn't an interview. It was a dressing-down, humiliation session. He didn't really ask me anything much. Here's the gist of what he said:
"Bapa kamu tahu tak, kamu seluar hanya ada dua? Kalau dia tahu, dia malu tak, anak dia macam ini?"
I said hidup saya susah. I explained my family background. And why I have banyak tanggungan.
"You are wrong!! Saya pun tak pernah tanggung orang macam itu. You must change the way you live."
He looked at my shoes, and he said, "Kasut kamu tak gilap."
I said I cycle to school everyday. How to gilap?
"COME ON... YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT!!"
Well, if I don't have a car, and my school is nearby, what's wrong with cycling to school?
"Kamu pakai baju apa itu. Cina tak boleh pakai gelap."
I said I'm a Christian, I don't abide by such superstitions. I said by the way, my shirt is blue. Not black.
"Kamu bukan Cina kah? You must be proud to be a Chinese... Malaysian Chinese..."
What does he know about being a Malaysian Chinese? We don't get Datukships and awards like him. We can't afford to be wearing designer clothes like him. We are not supported by the government's silver spoon in our mouth from the day we were born. We have to struggle to take care of our families. What does he know?
He said, "Dalam PIPP, ada dinyatakan kita harus memartabatkan profesion keguruan. Apa yang kamu faham tentang itu?"
That is the Teras Kelima in the Pelan Induk Pembangunan Pendidikan. I explained that according to the PIPP blueprint, we are supposed to upgrade the intake system of teachers and improve the working environment of teachers. I wasn't taking rubbish. That was the textbook answer.
He said, "Tak payah, tak payah. Kalau untuk kamu saja, macam mana?"
I said, "Kena memperbaiki imej, kalau menurut Dato."
He said "Gaji satu bulan berapa? Pergilah beli seluar..."
He even stood up to show me his slacks. He said a pair that costs seratus lebih would be a good one.
I cycle to school everyday. My shoes aren't shined. I can't afford a pair of slacks that cost over a hundred bucks. I don't have a coat. I guess I'm not fit to be a teacher.
Well, if they can pay me 4 grand a month, certainly the profession guru's martabat will be dipertingkatkan, isn't it?
If what I wear matters so much more than how I teach, then my workplace should not be in a musty classroom. I should be on the catwalk runway.
Here is the Dato’ that should be brought to the public’s attention.
http://www.alumnisas.com.my/asas/asasgmbr/dato%27HjAbdullah.jpg
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
And we wonder why Chinese parent's don't go...
Seminar Kecemerlangan Keibubapaan
Mengangani Gejala Disiplin Pelajar
Peringkat Daerah Gombak 2007
Perangsang Templer Golf Club
Mengangani Gejala Disiplin Pelajar
Peringkat Daerah Gombak 2007
Perangsang Templer Golf Club
The LCD projector screen shows a powerpoint slide, saying:
Pembentangan Kertas Kerja (1)
"Pendekatan Ke Arah membentuk Remaja Cemerlang"
Oleh: En. Sobri b. Abdul Ghani.
"Pendekatan Ke Arah membentuk Remaja Cemerlang"
Oleh: En. Sobri b. Abdul Ghani.
The "Encik" title is cover up. He is actually an ustaz.
He comes highly qualified. He is a graduate on Islamic studies from an Indonesian university. He has 10 kids of his own. "Tentulah dia cukup pengalaman untuk memberi ceramah," the emcee said.
On how to deal with a child with disciplinary problems, he showed us a demo. He said the west calls it "telepathy". It is a three-step methodology.
First, you go into your child's room when he is sleeping. If he is young, the door won't be closed. So it's easier.
1. Kneel down by the child's head. Then, speak in a whispering tone. Start off with love. Example, "Adam, saya sayangkan kamu. Kamu satu-satulah anak ayah. Walau apa-apa pun yang terjadi, atau apa-apa pun yang kau lakukan, engkau tetap anak ayah..."
2. Then, speak out your heart's content. Example, "Adam, ayah sangat sedih kerana engkau tidak dengar cakap ibu. Sayangkan lah ibu kau, Adam. Bila mak panggil berpuluh kali, kau tidak menjawab. Bila kawan telefon sekali saja, kau bergegas pergi..." Must maintain a whispering tone. Very important.
3. Finally, end with this. Put your hands of your thighs, palms face upwards, and say, "Pulanglah kepada Tuhan, Adam... Pulanglah kepada Tuhan..." Never say "Pulang kepada ayah," or "Pulang kepada ibu." Because "kalau makhluk panggil makhluk, dia hanya akan buat baik di depan mata kita. Tapi di belakang, dia masih jahat. Mesti panggil dia pulang kepada Tuhan."
You must do it for 3 months. If after a few weeks, you don't see any changes, don't be discouraged. Because his spirit is fighting it. Continue to speak to his spirit. After 3 months, it is done.
Amazing!
Second speaker, En. Ahmad Zamri b. Shamsudin. Again, the "Encik" is a cover up. He is also an ustaz.
This one, he only has 3 children. But what he lacks in progeny, he makes up for it in presentation. He came complete with songkok and black coat. The previous one only had a kopiah.
The LCD screen showed:
Pembentangan Kertas Kerja (2)
"Peranan Dan Tanggungjawab Ibubapa Dalam Menangani Isu-isu Disiplin Remaja Masa Kini"
He played arabic tunes every once in a while. He showed an explicit video of how a baby is brought into the world via C-section, with arabic music playing in the background. He quoted and expounded from the Quran.
The only way to curb discipline problems is to bring them back to Allah s.w.t. We, as parents, must bring them back to Allah. We take pains to make sure they score in UPSR, SPM, STPM, STAM. But do we make sure they make it to heaven? "Sayangkah kita kepada Nabi? Sayangkah kita kepada Nabi??"
I felt like I was sitting through a khutbah Jumaat in a mosque.
I walked out of the hall in disgust. Brushed by the Penyelia Petang and the school counselor on the way out. I hope they will ask me why I left the room. Because my lips are not capable of lying.
Both speakers are Muslim clerics. Both have no qualification whatsoever besides religious education. Both have nothing to say about early child care, teen psychology, phases of development and their needs, or anything professional of that sort. Both fail to tell me what I already know.
Yes, I do not deny the importance of religion is shaping a child's character. But what I got from the whole seminar was, Islamization is the answer. Or, if I were to be less blunt, religionize our kids is the answer.
If I had sat through the whole seminar until the Q&A, I would ask a question to both speakers:
"Saya Joshua Hooi, dari SMK Selayang Bharu. Saya setuju bahawa pendidikan agama adalah penting untuk membina insan yang baik...
Soalan saya ialah, terdapat ibu bapa yang sangat kuat beragama, tetapi anak-anak mereka masih jahat. Bahkan, lebih jahat daripada anak-anak yang beribu-bapa secularist. Apakah penjelasan anda?
Adakah pendekatan yang lain untuk menangani masalah disiplin, dari sudut profesional? Sebab saya hairan, mengapa saya tidak terdengar pun tentang apa-apa cadangan lain yang boleh diambil selain daripada pendidikan agama sahaja."
And watch my Pengetua's face twitch in horror. Tengoklah... Cikgu Cina bujang ini yang tiada bini, dan tak takut mati. Please send him to more seminars.
This seminar was organized and sanctioned by Pejabat Pendidikan Daerah Gombak. Every school had to send 4 teachers from the PIBG. Chinese schools and Tamil schools included. Each participant was charged RM100. The hall was arranged to have a seating capacity of 3000.
If I were to write to the press, my article would have this headline:
Embezzlement in Gombak by District Education Department.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Not fast, nevermind... but must shiny
What do you do when you’re on medical leave, and the weather is good?
Wax your car!
Here are some waxing tips for dummies. From a fellow dummy. You may find it helpful.
Pre-wax preparations:
1. Wash your car first. Any type of car wash shampoo will do. No need to waste money. Buy the type that says “car wash”, not “car wash and wax”. It’s better to wax your car separately.
2. Dry it fast! Before hydrophilic dust starts to stick to your car again. Use a rubber towel. It does a much better job than dry cloth.
During waxing:
3. Wax on. Use a soft, dry cloth (or a special applicator) to apply the wax. Do not use a sponge! It will soak up the wax when you’re applying in on your car.
Wax your car!
Here are some waxing tips for dummies. From a fellow dummy. You may find it helpful.
Pre-wax preparations:
1. Wash your car first. Any type of car wash shampoo will do. No need to waste money. Buy the type that says “car wash”, not “car wash and wax”. It’s better to wax your car separately.
2. Dry it fast! Before hydrophilic dust starts to stick to your car again. Use a rubber towel. It does a much better job than dry cloth.
During waxing:
3. Wax on. Use a soft, dry cloth (or a special applicator) to apply the wax. Do not use a sponge! It will soak up the wax when you’re applying in on your car.
- You don’t need to polish (as in, rub and scrub hard) when you’re applying the wax. Just apply it.
- Don’t be too stingy with the wax. Don’t apply too thin, until you cannot see the wax on your car. Don’t apply too thick, until it looks like your car kena colgate.
4. Wax off. Now, here is where you need to do the polishing. Use a microfibre cloth to “polish off” the wax. Use one side of the cloth to polish off the wax one time, and use the other side of the cloth to polish off another time. You should be able to see the gleam by the second polish.
- Point to stress: Waxing off is more important than waxing on. Firstly, the shiny gleam effect depends on how well you can polish off the wax. Secondly, if you don’t polish off the wax properly, the residue will make your car look stained.
Post-wax precautions:
5. Do not park your car under any trees! Or you will kena chiao sai! The last time I waxed, my car got bird poo-ed within 24 hours.
Birds always love to pang sai on clean, shiny, gleamy cars. Why? Lemme ask you la... When you go public toilet, do you look for a dirty toilet or clean, shiny one? Of course the clean, shiny wan, rite? Use your blain! Use your blain!
Waxing can be quite time consuming. Make sure you have a lot of time to spare before you start. The first time I did a wash + wax + window job, it took me more than 2 hours. Yesterday, I did it in only 1.5 hours! Vast improvement. I believe I can go much faster when I get used to it. Yesterday was only my second attempt.
This post was sponsored by Meguiar's Gold Class wax.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
To my brethren, whom I love
We are the Brethren. The world knows us as the Brethren. We do not want to be called a denomination, because a denomination is an institution governed by the laws of man. We believe that man has no right to make rules and regulations that institute a denomination. We believe only the Bible determines how believers should conduct ourselves.
Therefore, we strive to be denomination-less. We call ourselves the assembly. As in the assembly of believers.
However, the fact is, there is nothing we can do to shake off our denomination tag. No matter how we try to change our name. The way we name our churches gives us a distinctive in itself. Even if we call ourselves the “nameless church,” we are still a denomination, i.e. the nameless church.
We have an identity that we have put on ourselves ever since we were founded. We are who we are. We are the Brethren.
The world knows little of us. There are relatively few of us in the universal body of Christ. What pains me is how we see other Christians who are not from our assembly. Eight things I have to say to us, nine that sorrow my heart.
1. Therefore remember that you, once Gentiles in the flesh… that at that time you were without Christ, being aliens from the commonwealth of Israel and strangers from the covenants of promise, having no hope and without God in the world. But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. (Ephesians 2:11-12)
The barrier between the Circumcision and the Uncircumcision have been brought into the same commonwealth, as partakers of the same promise, through the blood of Christ. A barrier of such a great magnitude that extends across cultures, races, languages and spiritual background could be reconciled by Christ.
But yet, we see other Christians who are not from our assembly with a highly prejudiced eye. Even those who are of the same skin colour, who speak the same dialect, and are already citizens of the kingdom of God.
2. For He Himself is our peace, who has made both one, and has broken down the middle wall of separation, having abolished in His flesh the enmity, that is, the law of commandments contained in ordinances, so as to create in Himself one new man from the two, thus making peace, and that He might reconcile them both to God in one body through the cross, thereby putting to death the enmity. (Ephesians 2:14-16)
Christ Himself has put to death the enmity between Gentile and Jewish Christians by His own flesh. But yet, we erect walls of separation among fellow Gentile Christians who are not from our own.
Christ has made peace for two very irreconcilable people groups who profess to follow Him. But we keep our distance from Christians who are from outside our assembly, and do not even want to be seen with them.
3. For in fact the body is not one member but many. If the foot should say, “because I am not a hand, I am not of the body,” is it therefore not of the body? And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I am not of the body,” is it therefore not of the body? If fthe whole body were an eye, where would be the hearing? If the whole were hearing, where would be the smelling? But now God has set the members, each one of them, in the body just as He pleased. (1 Corinthians 12:14-18)
We interpret this as a teaching for the local church, but fail to see it extending to the universal church. God has set each of us in our places just as He pleased “for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ.” (Ephesians 4:12-13)
But we see other types of Christians as though nothing good can come out from them.
4. Paul exhorted us to “do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. (Philippians 2:3)
But we think as though we are exclusively correct, and better than everyone else.
Once I visited a Baptist church during one of my dark patches of my life. The head pastor came and spoke with me. He asked me where I was from. I said I come from a Brethren church. And he said, “Thank you for being gracious to us.”
Can we find such humility from among ourselves?
5. Jesus prayed, “…that they may be one just as We are one: I in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as You have loved Me” (John 17:22-23)
If Jesus’ prayer cannot be interpreted as a prayer for all believers in the universal body of Christ, I don’t know how else it can be interpreted.
6. Paul wrote, “Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.”
Have Christians from other denominations caused any evil to us? And yet we see other types of Christians as though they are the source of defilement to the sanctity of the body of Christ.
What regard do we have for them? If there are two ways to see something about them, we do not choose to see the good side of it.
How peaceable are we with them? Have we even tried?
7. Paul also wrote, “The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs – heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ…” (Romans 8:16-17)
We, together with other kinds of born-again believers, are joint heirs with Christ! We inherit every blessing that Christ inherits, together with Christians all around the world!
But yet we treat other kinds of Christians as though we don't share anything with them at all.
Are we pompous enough to say that they are not joint heirs with Christ along with us, when the Spirit Himself bears witness? Unless we go far enough to say that other Christians from outside our assembly are not the children of God. Have we gone that far?
8. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. (Ephesians 4:3)
There are 31,103 verses in the bible. And we have made every effort to ungraciously divide ourselves over 82 verses in the bible.
9. We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves. (Romans 15:1)
Given the assumption that we are doctrinally strong, do we bear with other Christians who are weak? We have preferred to not be associated with them because they are theologically inferior.
We who are strong in our theology… How strong are we in our application of it? For as long as we always think less of Christians who are not similar to ourselves, we are crippled babes in the practice of our faith.
We may have gotten our apologetics right in all areas in Scripture. But woe befalls us if we are found to fail badly in how Christ teaches us to live.
I am born a Brethren, bred a Brethren, serving as a Brethren, and intend to remain a Brethren. But one thing I strive is not to be denomination-centric. I believe it will do well for us to think likewise.
Therefore, we strive to be denomination-less. We call ourselves the assembly. As in the assembly of believers.
However, the fact is, there is nothing we can do to shake off our denomination tag. No matter how we try to change our name. The way we name our churches gives us a distinctive in itself. Even if we call ourselves the “nameless church,” we are still a denomination, i.e. the nameless church.
We have an identity that we have put on ourselves ever since we were founded. We are who we are. We are the Brethren.
The world knows little of us. There are relatively few of us in the universal body of Christ. What pains me is how we see other Christians who are not from our assembly. Eight things I have to say to us, nine that sorrow my heart.
1. Therefore remember that you, once Gentiles in the flesh… that at that time you were without Christ, being aliens from the commonwealth of Israel and strangers from the covenants of promise, having no hope and without God in the world. But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. (Ephesians 2:11-12)
The barrier between the Circumcision and the Uncircumcision have been brought into the same commonwealth, as partakers of the same promise, through the blood of Christ. A barrier of such a great magnitude that extends across cultures, races, languages and spiritual background could be reconciled by Christ.
But yet, we see other Christians who are not from our assembly with a highly prejudiced eye. Even those who are of the same skin colour, who speak the same dialect, and are already citizens of the kingdom of God.
2. For He Himself is our peace, who has made both one, and has broken down the middle wall of separation, having abolished in His flesh the enmity, that is, the law of commandments contained in ordinances, so as to create in Himself one new man from the two, thus making peace, and that He might reconcile them both to God in one body through the cross, thereby putting to death the enmity. (Ephesians 2:14-16)
Christ Himself has put to death the enmity between Gentile and Jewish Christians by His own flesh. But yet, we erect walls of separation among fellow Gentile Christians who are not from our own.
Christ has made peace for two very irreconcilable people groups who profess to follow Him. But we keep our distance from Christians who are from outside our assembly, and do not even want to be seen with them.
3. For in fact the body is not one member but many. If the foot should say, “because I am not a hand, I am not of the body,” is it therefore not of the body? And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I am not of the body,” is it therefore not of the body? If fthe whole body were an eye, where would be the hearing? If the whole were hearing, where would be the smelling? But now God has set the members, each one of them, in the body just as He pleased. (1 Corinthians 12:14-18)
We interpret this as a teaching for the local church, but fail to see it extending to the universal church. God has set each of us in our places just as He pleased “for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ.” (Ephesians 4:12-13)
But we see other types of Christians as though nothing good can come out from them.
4. Paul exhorted us to “do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. (Philippians 2:3)
But we think as though we are exclusively correct, and better than everyone else.
Once I visited a Baptist church during one of my dark patches of my life. The head pastor came and spoke with me. He asked me where I was from. I said I come from a Brethren church. And he said, “Thank you for being gracious to us.”
Can we find such humility from among ourselves?
5. Jesus prayed, “…that they may be one just as We are one: I in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as You have loved Me” (John 17:22-23)
If Jesus’ prayer cannot be interpreted as a prayer for all believers in the universal body of Christ, I don’t know how else it can be interpreted.
6. Paul wrote, “Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.”
Have Christians from other denominations caused any evil to us? And yet we see other types of Christians as though they are the source of defilement to the sanctity of the body of Christ.
What regard do we have for them? If there are two ways to see something about them, we do not choose to see the good side of it.
How peaceable are we with them? Have we even tried?
7. Paul also wrote, “The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs – heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ…” (Romans 8:16-17)
We, together with other kinds of born-again believers, are joint heirs with Christ! We inherit every blessing that Christ inherits, together with Christians all around the world!
But yet we treat other kinds of Christians as though we don't share anything with them at all.
Are we pompous enough to say that they are not joint heirs with Christ along with us, when the Spirit Himself bears witness? Unless we go far enough to say that other Christians from outside our assembly are not the children of God. Have we gone that far?
8. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. (Ephesians 4:3)
There are 31,103 verses in the bible. And we have made every effort to ungraciously divide ourselves over 82 verses in the bible.
9. We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves. (Romans 15:1)
Given the assumption that we are doctrinally strong, do we bear with other Christians who are weak? We have preferred to not be associated with them because they are theologically inferior.
We who are strong in our theology… How strong are we in our application of it? For as long as we always think less of Christians who are not similar to ourselves, we are crippled babes in the practice of our faith.
We may have gotten our apologetics right in all areas in Scripture. But woe befalls us if we are found to fail badly in how Christ teaches us to live.
I am born a Brethren, bred a Brethren, serving as a Brethren, and intend to remain a Brethren. But one thing I strive is not to be denomination-centric. I believe it will do well for us to think likewise.
Saturday, September 01, 2007
I love patriotic songs
Buruh, nelayan dan juga petani
Gaya hidup kini dah berubahAnak-anak terasuk mindanya
Tengok benda apa mereka pandai
Pakar IT, pakar ekonomiBerkereta jenama negara
Beli Myvi lagilah bergaya!
Alam cyber teknologi terkini
Ahli Cabinet tiada email lagi
Biar di kota ataupun desa, kita semua
Pasti nak terketawa!
One true test of maturity is the ability to laugh at ourselves - Someone-say-wan-I-can't-remember-who
Friday, August 31, 2007
De-fabrication hypothesis
My thoughts this merdeka: We no longer know what it means. And that is the cause of the de-fabrication of racial unity.
We keep hearing the point emphasized over and over again that we must appreciate our independence, and what it means to us. But I guess for third generation Malaysians, it is very hard to see it any more than a lot of pomp, or a holiday. Why is that?
Simple. Because we were not there. And we can't go back and try to appreciate merdeka experientially. Even if we camped overnight in school and ate ubi kayu ala Japanese occupation. Because first of all, our ubi kayu tasted good. Secondly, we had barbeque chicken, catfish, and lamb to go with it. And thirdly, we weren't around during 1941-1945.
Third generation Malaysians wake up, and get a social contract from their forefather's time forced down their throats. That doesn't help in their appreciation of merdeka either.
It is a fact we have to face. We weren't around during the British occupation. We weren't around during the Japanese occupation. We weren't around when the British regained occupation. And there is just so much we can appreciate something of the past without going through it experientially.
Anyway, let me digress...
Did anyone ever wonder how Tunku Abdul Rahman managed to negotiate our way to independence? Don't you think that is something monumentally difficult to do, that borders on impossibility? What did he actually say? What did he actually do? If you were a Brit, why would you want to leave Malaya permanently, in a win-lose situation?
My colleague commented that Tunku Abdul Rahman bought a fruit as a gift for the British at the negotiating table. And consuming the fruit affected their judgment.
???
Sometimes you can never tell if my male colleagues are serious. Cos they can really talk nonsense with a straight face.
Now, back to my point. We can't fully appreciate something, or be good at something, before going through it experientially. Think about the value of working experience. Think about your conversion experience. Do you think you'd be equally as appreciative, if you have not seen the before and after?
Our forefathers who had lived through the pre-independence era seemed to be able to get along better with other races. I put it to you that it is because they understood and accepted the social contract back then. Third generation Malaysians see the fabric of racial unity falling apart. Because we no longer see how that same social contract applies to us when we have not been there to be part of it.
Abdullah Badawi mentioned some time ago that the social contract will be reviewed. I think it's a good effort to be reviewed. But I doubt it will be amended.
To see why we possibly won't want it to be amended, we have to put ourselves in a Bumiputera's shoes. We will look to Australia. Do we want the same fate that has happened to the aborigines to fall on us too? We will look to South Africa. Do we want people from a different color skin to become the dominant race in our own land?
No, we don't. They can live in our land. But they cannot live off our land. When they first arrived, they were tin miners and rubber tappers. Since they stuck around until merdeka, we offered them a social contract. They were very happy with it anyway. So we keep it at that. And that is the way it should stay.
There isn't any logic to give absolute equality to people who came to our land just to work, isn't it? Would you want to give equal status to the Indonesian maid who lives in your house? If the maid gets married, has children, and her whole family continues working in your house, are you going to elevate her family's status?
It actually makes a lot of sense to maintain the social contract the way it is... If we were in their shoes.
On the other hand, we stand in our own shoes... Here's how I feel.
We always hear things like "Cina babi." Or "Cina balik China." Truth be told: If I am made to return to China, I will be grieved. Why would I want to return to China? I wasn't from China in the first place. How do I return to a place I didn't come from?
If Malaysia is taken away from us, we have nowhere to go.
So stop seeing us as immigrants from China. We are not from China. We are from Malaysia. We are Malaysians.
It is something hard for westerners to understand how you can be Chinese and not be from China, or how you can be Malaysian and not be Malay. Ask anyone who has gone for student exchange in foreign countries.
I am hoping that we, as Malaysians, can understand this better than westerners.
MERDEKA!! MERDEKA!!! MERDEK...
Eh, actually how many times did Tunku Abdul Rahman say merdeka ah? Until now I also dunno...
We keep hearing the point emphasized over and over again that we must appreciate our independence, and what it means to us. But I guess for third generation Malaysians, it is very hard to see it any more than a lot of pomp, or a holiday. Why is that?
Simple. Because we were not there. And we can't go back and try to appreciate merdeka experientially. Even if we camped overnight in school and ate ubi kayu ala Japanese occupation. Because first of all, our ubi kayu tasted good. Secondly, we had barbeque chicken, catfish, and lamb to go with it. And thirdly, we weren't around during 1941-1945.
Third generation Malaysians wake up, and get a social contract from their forefather's time forced down their throats. That doesn't help in their appreciation of merdeka either.
It is a fact we have to face. We weren't around during the British occupation. We weren't around during the Japanese occupation. We weren't around when the British regained occupation. And there is just so much we can appreciate something of the past without going through it experientially.
Anyway, let me digress...
Did anyone ever wonder how Tunku Abdul Rahman managed to negotiate our way to independence? Don't you think that is something monumentally difficult to do, that borders on impossibility? What did he actually say? What did he actually do? If you were a Brit, why would you want to leave Malaya permanently, in a win-lose situation?
My colleague commented that Tunku Abdul Rahman bought a fruit as a gift for the British at the negotiating table. And consuming the fruit affected their judgment.
???
Sometimes you can never tell if my male colleagues are serious. Cos they can really talk nonsense with a straight face.
Now, back to my point. We can't fully appreciate something, or be good at something, before going through it experientially. Think about the value of working experience. Think about your conversion experience. Do you think you'd be equally as appreciative, if you have not seen the before and after?
Our forefathers who had lived through the pre-independence era seemed to be able to get along better with other races. I put it to you that it is because they understood and accepted the social contract back then. Third generation Malaysians see the fabric of racial unity falling apart. Because we no longer see how that same social contract applies to us when we have not been there to be part of it.
Abdullah Badawi mentioned some time ago that the social contract will be reviewed. I think it's a good effort to be reviewed. But I doubt it will be amended.
To see why we possibly won't want it to be amended, we have to put ourselves in a Bumiputera's shoes. We will look to Australia. Do we want the same fate that has happened to the aborigines to fall on us too? We will look to South Africa. Do we want people from a different color skin to become the dominant race in our own land?
No, we don't. They can live in our land. But they cannot live off our land. When they first arrived, they were tin miners and rubber tappers. Since they stuck around until merdeka, we offered them a social contract. They were very happy with it anyway. So we keep it at that. And that is the way it should stay.
There isn't any logic to give absolute equality to people who came to our land just to work, isn't it? Would you want to give equal status to the Indonesian maid who lives in your house? If the maid gets married, has children, and her whole family continues working in your house, are you going to elevate her family's status?
It actually makes a lot of sense to maintain the social contract the way it is... If we were in their shoes.
On the other hand, we stand in our own shoes... Here's how I feel.
We always hear things like "Cina babi." Or "Cina balik China." Truth be told: If I am made to return to China, I will be grieved. Why would I want to return to China? I wasn't from China in the first place. How do I return to a place I didn't come from?
If Malaysia is taken away from us, we have nowhere to go.
So stop seeing us as immigrants from China. We are not from China. We are from Malaysia. We are Malaysians.
It is something hard for westerners to understand how you can be Chinese and not be from China, or how you can be Malaysian and not be Malay. Ask anyone who has gone for student exchange in foreign countries.
I am hoping that we, as Malaysians, can understand this better than westerners.
MERDEKA!! MERDEKA!!! MERDEK...
Eh, actually how many times did Tunku Abdul Rahman say merdeka ah? Until now I also dunno...
Thursday, August 09, 2007
Eradicate poverty, or develop human resource?
Our Dasar Ekonomi is to mengurangkan jurang antara yang kaya dengan yang miskin, dan membasmi kemiskinan. Our Pelan Induk Pendidikan is to membangunkan modal insan. How does the two go hand-in-hand together?
Theoretically, by membangunkan modal insan, we will equip more citizens to find jobs. Eventually, it will lead to membasmi kemiskinan.
Theoretically, that is.
There's this girl in my class. Let's call her J. She just became a prefect. But her grades are bad. Because she works everyday after school.
There's this other girl in my class. Let's call her N. She just became a prefect too. And her grades are just as bad. She works in a hand phone shop everyday after school.
There's another girl in my class. Let's call her U. Her grades are sad. She travels to KL after school everyday to help her parents at a traditional medicine shop.
I have a boy in my class. His grades are sad too. He works 3 times a day, loading and unloading cargo.
I have a girl in my class who got transferred out from my school. After a month, she came back. Her mum came to see me, asking me to allow her to join her classmates again. Her mum is a single parent. She has many children. She couldn't pay up her zakat. She just lost her house, electricity got cut, and water supply got cut. She got evicted. She doesn't have anyone who is big enough to take all of them in. So, her family is torn apart. Each of her children have to bunk in with other kind families at separate homes.
Poverty is a real problem. I see it everyday. It is important to ensure that our education system can effectively equip students to become wage-earners. Education is the only way to break the vicious cycle of poverty.
And how have we done that?
We have made public exams easier. Or lowered the passing grade. Notice how easily the 'As' come nowadays?
By doing that, we increase the number of people who can get a passing grade. Therefore, we churn out more SPM holders to the street. Does a bigger percentage of SPM holders become decent wage earners?
No. Because deep down inside, they know they are far from equipped.
Yes, we have "developed our human resource". We have produced more people who can pass public exams. We have churned out more degree holders than never before. But guess what. The problem of poverty is still there.
Why? Because we are merely fooling ourselves. Any employer from any reputable local company knows that a student's exam grade today may not truly reflect his intelligence. It gets worse overseas. Any employer from overseas sees our academic credentials as a twisted yardstick.
When you look at it critically, membasmi kemiskinan and membangunkan modal insan, in our context, cannot go hand-in-hand.
You wanna membasmi kemiskinan? Ok. Lower the standards of education. So more people can be employed locally. But that will mean our nation will become progressively under-developed. So much for membangunkan modal insan.
You wanna membangunkan modal insan? Ok. Raise the standards of education. So more people of real quality can contribute to society. But that will mean the poor will still remain poor, because they probably won't make it. So much for membasmi kemiskinan.
It's either one, or the other. We can't have it both ways.
Between membasmi kemiskinan and membangunkan modal insan... We have chosen the former.
Theoretically, by membangunkan modal insan, we will equip more citizens to find jobs. Eventually, it will lead to membasmi kemiskinan.
Theoretically, that is.
There's this girl in my class. Let's call her J. She just became a prefect. But her grades are bad. Because she works everyday after school.
There's this other girl in my class. Let's call her N. She just became a prefect too. And her grades are just as bad. She works in a hand phone shop everyday after school.
There's another girl in my class. Let's call her U. Her grades are sad. She travels to KL after school everyday to help her parents at a traditional medicine shop.
I have a boy in my class. His grades are sad too. He works 3 times a day, loading and unloading cargo.
I have a girl in my class who got transferred out from my school. After a month, she came back. Her mum came to see me, asking me to allow her to join her classmates again. Her mum is a single parent. She has many children. She couldn't pay up her zakat. She just lost her house, electricity got cut, and water supply got cut. She got evicted. She doesn't have anyone who is big enough to take all of them in. So, her family is torn apart. Each of her children have to bunk in with other kind families at separate homes.
Poverty is a real problem. I see it everyday. It is important to ensure that our education system can effectively equip students to become wage-earners. Education is the only way to break the vicious cycle of poverty.
And how have we done that?
We have made public exams easier. Or lowered the passing grade. Notice how easily the 'As' come nowadays?
By doing that, we increase the number of people who can get a passing grade. Therefore, we churn out more SPM holders to the street. Does a bigger percentage of SPM holders become decent wage earners?
No. Because deep down inside, they know they are far from equipped.
Yes, we have "developed our human resource". We have produced more people who can pass public exams. We have churned out more degree holders than never before. But guess what. The problem of poverty is still there.
Why? Because we are merely fooling ourselves. Any employer from any reputable local company knows that a student's exam grade today may not truly reflect his intelligence. It gets worse overseas. Any employer from overseas sees our academic credentials as a twisted yardstick.
When you look at it critically, membasmi kemiskinan and membangunkan modal insan, in our context, cannot go hand-in-hand.
You wanna membasmi kemiskinan? Ok. Lower the standards of education. So more people can be employed locally. But that will mean our nation will become progressively under-developed. So much for membangunkan modal insan.
You wanna membangunkan modal insan? Ok. Raise the standards of education. So more people of real quality can contribute to society. But that will mean the poor will still remain poor, because they probably won't make it. So much for membasmi kemiskinan.
It's either one, or the other. We can't have it both ways.
Between membasmi kemiskinan and membangunkan modal insan... We have chosen the former.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
