... A Muslim cleric queried me in an old blog post, Do Christian Evolutionists Exist. Old enough to feel like it was a blast from the past!
He said he finds it ironic that Christians believe in a transcendent God, who is a higher determinant, who cannot be part of what is being determined. Because Christians say that Jesus is God, when he is provenly the "being determined" for he walked on Earth, was a historical figure, was a part of creation, therefore a non-transcendent.
I am reminded once again of my initial purpose of starting this blog. Which is to minister to all who read it. Hence, the name Hasten Ministries.
I am encouraged by the fact that my writings can reach just about anybody, anywhere in the world. I realize that there are many silent readers, whom I could have affected with strokes on a keyboard, without knowing it.
I am inspired again to see my blogging as a ministry.
A lot of my blogging energy has been channeled to my church's Young Adults blog. You can read about what was preached over the pulpit every Sunday.
Reflections, thoughts, opinions, and spin-off discussions are hoped to spring off from there. Sunday sermons should be more than a one-off weekend thing. It should be a message that is discussed, meditated upon, and practised throughout the week. It is with this hope that the Kepong Gospel Chapel blog has taken this new direction.
Feel free to check it out at http://kgcyoungadults.blogspot.com/.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Monday, January 21, 2008
Rombak in Gombak
No, it's not Rumble in the Bronx. It's the local version. It is... Rombak in Gombak.
The school time table will be reshuffled again. Rombak lagi. It's the third time already this year. "Not enough teachers" is the reason. 9 teachers are leaving.
Just when we thought we can have 24 periods per week... It's going up again.
Pn. P says she'll leave next year. By hook or by crook. If that happens, that means... I will have more Add Math classes to teach! And less periods with kelas-kelas separuh iblis! Hooray!
Speaking of kelas-kelas separuh iblis... There was this separuh iblis in my 4 Neptune class last year. I heard during the Mesyuarat Lembaga Disiplin that apparently, this separuh iblis has Indon parents. Both his parents ran back to Indonesia. He's left with the whatever-whoever-Indons to look after him.
No wonder he became delinquent...
More on the Mesyuarat Lembaga disiplin. I'm not given the kuasa merotan yet. Yet. Har har har. Imagine when that day comes...
Robocop by day. Dark Justice by night.
You can run. But you can't hide.
Hard core cases were discussed during the meeting. To help teachers keep track of the hard core students, we tried to find out which classes they are in this year. Guess what.
Of all the Malay boys mentioned...
All of them...
Are in my class.
Robocop or not?
In my own name list, there are 45 people in my class.
In the official name list, I have 37 people in my class.
That means, 8 of them are pendatang haram.
They find their hard core friends.
They see my class got a lot.
They come in.
They sit down.
They say they baru masuk my class.
Robocop or not?
I asked the Penolong Kanan HEM. What do I do the next time I come across our own students taking drugs outside the school?
The answer I got was... Call police. Or take their photo with my handphone.
If the Lembaga Disiplin can sponsor a camera phone, I will Robocop lah.
Tactics from the crypt. You know how they trick students?
They come to you and offer a job.
First month, they pay you RM200 as agreed.
Second month, they pay you RM200 as agreed.
Third month, they pay you RM150. Or RM100.
Fourth month, they give you a handphone. Canggih wan. They say the handphone costs more than their monthly pay. The student takes the handphone.
Now, the student has to work for months and months and months, till late at night, to earn back how much the handphone was worth.
Student gets "stuck" with the handphone.
Student goes to work because of the handphone.
Student doesn't get cash because of the handphone.
Student gets trapped because of the handphone.
Student gets enslaved.
Student becomes desperate.
Student turns delinquent.
If it's a girl, they use a handphone as bait. If it's a boy, they use a motorbike.
Needless to say, the handphones and motorbikes are stolen stuff.
Selayang needs a Saviour.
Don't look at me. I'm just... Errr... Math teacher.
Nah, give you inspiration...
The future of law enforcement.
The school time table will be reshuffled again. Rombak lagi. It's the third time already this year. "Not enough teachers" is the reason. 9 teachers are leaving.
Just when we thought we can have 24 periods per week... It's going up again.
Pn. P says she'll leave next year. By hook or by crook. If that happens, that means... I will have more Add Math classes to teach! And less periods with kelas-kelas separuh iblis! Hooray!
* * * * * * * * * *
Speaking of kelas-kelas separuh iblis... There was this separuh iblis in my 4 Neptune class last year. I heard during the Mesyuarat Lembaga Disiplin that apparently, this separuh iblis has Indon parents. Both his parents ran back to Indonesia. He's left with the whatever-whoever-Indons to look after him.
No wonder he became delinquent...
* * * * * * * * * *
More on the Mesyuarat Lembaga disiplin. I'm not given the kuasa merotan yet. Yet. Har har har. Imagine when that day comes...
Robocop by day. Dark Justice by night.
You can run. But you can't hide.
* * * * * * * * * *
Hard core cases were discussed during the meeting. To help teachers keep track of the hard core students, we tried to find out which classes they are in this year. Guess what.
Of all the Malay boys mentioned...
All of them...
Are in my class.
Robocop or not?
* * * * * * * * * *
In my own name list, there are 45 people in my class.
In the official name list, I have 37 people in my class.
That means, 8 of them are pendatang haram.
They find their hard core friends.
They see my class got a lot.
They come in.
They sit down.
They say they baru masuk my class.
Robocop or not?
* * * * * * * * * *
I asked the Penolong Kanan HEM. What do I do the next time I come across our own students taking drugs outside the school?
The answer I got was... Call police. Or take their photo with my handphone.
If the Lembaga Disiplin can sponsor a camera phone, I will Robocop lah.
* * * * * * * * * *
Tactics from the crypt. You know how they trick students?
They come to you and offer a job.
First month, they pay you RM200 as agreed.
Second month, they pay you RM200 as agreed.
Third month, they pay you RM150. Or RM100.
Fourth month, they give you a handphone. Canggih wan. They say the handphone costs more than their monthly pay. The student takes the handphone.
Now, the student has to work for months and months and months, till late at night, to earn back how much the handphone was worth.
Student gets "stuck" with the handphone.
Student goes to work because of the handphone.
Student doesn't get cash because of the handphone.
Student gets trapped because of the handphone.
Student gets enslaved.
Student becomes desperate.
Student turns delinquent.
If it's a girl, they use a handphone as bait. If it's a boy, they use a motorbike.
Needless to say, the handphones and motorbikes are stolen stuff.
* * * * * * * * * *
Selayang needs a Saviour.
Don't look at me. I'm just... Errr... Math teacher.
* * * * * * * * * *
Nah, give you inspiration...
The future of law enforcement.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Sometimes I wonder...
... If I am schizophrenic.
Sometimes, I feel like I wanna lock people up into iron cages and drown them. Sometimes I feel like I wanna literally seize boys by their collar and throw them out of the class. Sometimes I feel like scolding the sons of the soil in English with poisonous words, beautifully profound, but yet not vulgar. So they can't accuse me verbally abusing them because there is no way their vocabulary permits them to repeat what I said.
But sometimes... I wonder what the sons of the soil do after school. What they must go through just to get by. How it must be like to be born into a religion they didn't choose. And how I can help them have a better life.
Sometimes I feel like an idiot, trying to cast my pearls before swine. I feel like doing what Paul says in Romans, to "give them up" to whatever they wanna be. Or, like in Exodus, God hardens Pharaoh's heart - not by actively doing it. He merely let Pharaoh be. Like clay that is not spun by the potter, it hardens by itself.
It's not what you do. It's what you don't do. All I have to do is withhold my knowledge from them. They will be condemned to a future of failure, suffering and darkness.
But sometimes... I feel like I've impacted the people who really need it the most. I feel that if 1 person in the class has benefited from my teaching, it makes all the effort worth it. Even if only 1 student bothered to come up to me, I shall in no wise turn him away. Even in a cell of malevolent, delinquent monkeys, I find more pleasure in making things click for 1 boy, than castrating all the monkeys together. It happened for me in 4 Neptune last year.
Sometimes, I think the school is crazy. Senior teachers suggest my name without me knowing it, and I get piled up with positions I never coveted nor asked for. And I start wishing I was dumb and demented, so I won't have to take it.
But sometimes... I stay up late just typing out name lists... Thinking of ways to do things differently... Going to the Sri Siantan pool to negotiate with the authorities, trying to get special rates for my Swimming Club students, and thinking of ways to strike connections with students outside a classroom environment.
Sometimes, I feel like my self-worth is questionable. I feel like there is no honour in what I do. No one really clamours for my job. Usually under-achievers aim for it to ride under the government's wings.
I don't have the privilege of going for an interview, and measuring what I'm worth against my employer's expectations, have the pleasure of meeting it, and enjoy just rewards that come with it. Even in the interview that I had with the SPP, frankly, I think it was an insulting joke. I don't see how I can fail. And even if I pass (which I did), I don't see the honour in it.
I don't have any avenues for self-development. I feel as though I am stuck under a school ceiling, with an academic prowess that does not need to exceed a 17-year-old's. Instead of opportunities to grow, I find that there are more chances of growing numb and stagnated.
But sometimes... I feel that I have the best job in the world. I feel like it's the best decision I've made in my life, career-wise. If eternity is real, I feel that there is no other job under heaven that I would want to do, and no other place I would want to work, other than in a place with unlimited potential, continuously ripe for harvest.
Sometimes I think my anger is murder.
But sometimes... I think my anger is righteous.
Sometimes, I think I'm wrong for doing the wrong thing.
Sometimes, I think I'm wrong for doing the right thing.
But sometimes... I think I'm right for doing the wrong thing.
Sometimes I think I am a sinner.
But sometimes... I think I am a saint.
Sometimes, I like this version:
But sometimes... I like this one better:
And sometimes I want to eat chicken chop.
But sometimes... I want to eat fish and chips.
Sometimes, I feel like I wanna lock people up into iron cages and drown them. Sometimes I feel like I wanna literally seize boys by their collar and throw them out of the class. Sometimes I feel like scolding the sons of the soil in English with poisonous words, beautifully profound, but yet not vulgar. So they can't accuse me verbally abusing them because there is no way their vocabulary permits them to repeat what I said.
But sometimes... I wonder what the sons of the soil do after school. What they must go through just to get by. How it must be like to be born into a religion they didn't choose. And how I can help them have a better life.
Sometimes I feel like an idiot, trying to cast my pearls before swine. I feel like doing what Paul says in Romans, to "give them up" to whatever they wanna be. Or, like in Exodus, God hardens Pharaoh's heart - not by actively doing it. He merely let Pharaoh be. Like clay that is not spun by the potter, it hardens by itself.
It's not what you do. It's what you don't do. All I have to do is withhold my knowledge from them. They will be condemned to a future of failure, suffering and darkness.
But sometimes... I feel like I've impacted the people who really need it the most. I feel that if 1 person in the class has benefited from my teaching, it makes all the effort worth it. Even if only 1 student bothered to come up to me, I shall in no wise turn him away. Even in a cell of malevolent, delinquent monkeys, I find more pleasure in making things click for 1 boy, than castrating all the monkeys together. It happened for me in 4 Neptune last year.
Sometimes, I think the school is crazy. Senior teachers suggest my name without me knowing it, and I get piled up with positions I never coveted nor asked for. And I start wishing I was dumb and demented, so I won't have to take it.
But sometimes... I stay up late just typing out name lists... Thinking of ways to do things differently... Going to the Sri Siantan pool to negotiate with the authorities, trying to get special rates for my Swimming Club students, and thinking of ways to strike connections with students outside a classroom environment.
Sometimes, I feel like my self-worth is questionable. I feel like there is no honour in what I do. No one really clamours for my job. Usually under-achievers aim for it to ride under the government's wings.
I don't have the privilege of going for an interview, and measuring what I'm worth against my employer's expectations, have the pleasure of meeting it, and enjoy just rewards that come with it. Even in the interview that I had with the SPP, frankly, I think it was an insulting joke. I don't see how I can fail. And even if I pass (which I did), I don't see the honour in it.
I don't have any avenues for self-development. I feel as though I am stuck under a school ceiling, with an academic prowess that does not need to exceed a 17-year-old's. Instead of opportunities to grow, I find that there are more chances of growing numb and stagnated.
But sometimes... I feel that I have the best job in the world. I feel like it's the best decision I've made in my life, career-wise. If eternity is real, I feel that there is no other job under heaven that I would want to do, and no other place I would want to work, other than in a place with unlimited potential, continuously ripe for harvest.
Sometimes I think my anger is murder.
But sometimes... I think my anger is righteous.
Sometimes, I think I'm wrong for doing the wrong thing.
Sometimes, I think I'm wrong for doing the right thing.
But sometimes... I think I'm right for doing the wrong thing.
Sometimes I think I am a sinner.
But sometimes... I think I am a saint.
Sometimes, I like this version:
But sometimes... I like this one better:
And sometimes I want to eat chicken chop.
But sometimes... I want to eat fish and chips.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Sweeney Todd of Selayang
I went to Selayang Mall today to get a haircut. Found a shop that gives a student cut for RM5, advanced student cut for RM8.
For the less informed, student cut does not mean special rate for students. Student cut means there are students in the saloon who are learning to cut hair. Part of their learning requires real life samples. If you don't mind being a real life sample, you ask for a student cut. A student will come and cut for you. It comes at a fraction of a price. A hairstyler's cut is at RM15.
Over some small talk, the trainee came to know that I was a teacher. She was a former student of SMK Darul Ehsan, the school right beside mine. The school that sucks away the top PMR performers from us, leaving us with refuse.
Getting to the point of the story...
That trainee went and punked me.
I said "Slope on the sides. Slope at the back."
She literally hacked off my sides and the back! Way up high!
Now, I look like a local punk. The kind that Selayang kids think looks cool.
She knew fairly well that I was a school teacher, for cryin' out loud. And she went and punked me.
I was even wearing a batik that time (On the 1st and 15th of every month, government servants wear batik to work). If I was wearing some la-la clothes, it's understandable lah. I was in a batik...
And she still went and punked me.
Can you imagine how that looked? Batik... With punk hair?
Maybe she thinks hairstyling = hair-punking.
All kids in Selayang like punk-style.
I am in Selayang.
Therefore, I must like punk style.
Her syllogism was intact.
It's a love-hate relationship, Selayang and I.
Either it was her faulty logic, or her faulty skill. Maybe she tried to do a slope. And she went, "Ooops... Let's try again." She tried to do a slope again. And she went "Ooops... Let's try again." After many many tries... She has nothing left for a slope. She hacked everything off.
Oh, and she took 2 hours to do that.
You may be thinking, "Why didn't I stop her if I knew she was doing it wrong?" The thing is, when I take off my glasses, I can't see a thing! By the time I felt something was not quite right, she was almost done. I put on my glasses. And...
What the punk??
I thought I wanted to take pictures of my new hairstyle, and post them here. But after thinking about it... No way.
If I had a choice, I'll stay indoors until March.
I wonder how in the world I'm gonna go to school tomorrow.
Since I'm at it, I may as well wear drainpipe jeans and a black, stretchy shirt, isn't it? And drape a chain around my right arm.
If I hear any wolf-whistles tomorrow, I will kill.
For the less informed, student cut does not mean special rate for students. Student cut means there are students in the saloon who are learning to cut hair. Part of their learning requires real life samples. If you don't mind being a real life sample, you ask for a student cut. A student will come and cut for you. It comes at a fraction of a price. A hairstyler's cut is at RM15.
Over some small talk, the trainee came to know that I was a teacher. She was a former student of SMK Darul Ehsan, the school right beside mine. The school that sucks away the top PMR performers from us, leaving us with refuse.
Getting to the point of the story...
That trainee went and punked me.
I said "Slope on the sides. Slope at the back."
She literally hacked off my sides and the back! Way up high!
Now, I look like a local punk. The kind that Selayang kids think looks cool.
She knew fairly well that I was a school teacher, for cryin' out loud. And she went and punked me.
I was even wearing a batik that time (On the 1st and 15th of every month, government servants wear batik to work). If I was wearing some la-la clothes, it's understandable lah. I was in a batik...
And she still went and punked me.
Can you imagine how that looked? Batik... With punk hair?
Maybe she thinks hairstyling = hair-punking.
All kids in Selayang like punk-style.
I am in Selayang.
Therefore, I must like punk style.
Her syllogism was intact.
It's a love-hate relationship, Selayang and I.
Either it was her faulty logic, or her faulty skill. Maybe she tried to do a slope. And she went, "Ooops... Let's try again." She tried to do a slope again. And she went "Ooops... Let's try again." After many many tries... She has nothing left for a slope. She hacked everything off.
Oh, and she took 2 hours to do that.
You may be thinking, "Why didn't I stop her if I knew she was doing it wrong?" The thing is, when I take off my glasses, I can't see a thing! By the time I felt something was not quite right, she was almost done. I put on my glasses. And...
What the punk??
I thought I wanted to take pictures of my new hairstyle, and post them here. But after thinking about it... No way.
If I had a choice, I'll stay indoors until March.
I wonder how in the world I'm gonna go to school tomorrow.
Since I'm at it, I may as well wear drainpipe jeans and a black, stretchy shirt, isn't it? And drape a chain around my right arm.
If I hear any wolf-whistles tomorrow, I will kill.
Monday, January 14, 2008
Squeezy toy
"I want squeezy toy", says Mei Yee.
She gets squeezy toy for Christmas. Introducing... Noel!
Found her at a pet shop at Ikano Power Center. She was free for adoption. Was initially trying to shop for a handbag. "Liz Clairborne good ah? For RM1**" I asked my advisor, Li May via SMS. "How's the quality? Leather or PVC?"
*Lost*
Luckily I got this one. You can't possibly go wrong with a squeezy toy.
Here's a close up:
She likes to hide under enclosed spaces. Scared kua...
When she first arrived, she does not mew. She screams! EOW! EOW! EOW! EOW! EOW! If she has a surname, it must be Eow.
That was back then. Now, hardly 3 weeks later, she has become a manja miaow. You can easily tangkap her.
She's a small thing, really. Can cuddle her up into a ball.
Oh, shit...
Bath time! The first time she went to take a bath, she was made a huge racket! EEEEEOOOOOOOWWWW!! EEEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWW!! Claws all come out.
Now, when she takes a bath... Not a mew!
After she's shampoo-ed, she does it her way.
Finally done, feeling like a million bucks.
Small, cute thing. She even sleeps with Mei Yee on her bed. But she's real smart, for a kitten. She does not poo on her bed. In fact, she does not poo anywhere else. She does it in the yellow litter box. Then, she buries the poo herself. And she's careful enough to not step on any of her poo.
She likes humans...
And warm, enclosed spaces too...
I can't believe I talk to kittens nowadays...
She gets squeezy toy for Christmas. Introducing... Noel!
Found her at a pet shop at Ikano Power Center. She was free for adoption. Was initially trying to shop for a handbag. "Liz Clairborne good ah? For RM1**" I asked my advisor, Li May via SMS. "How's the quality? Leather or PVC?"
*Lost*
Luckily I got this one. You can't possibly go wrong with a squeezy toy.
Here's a close up:
She likes to hide under enclosed spaces. Scared kua...
When she first arrived, she does not mew. She screams! EOW! EOW! EOW! EOW! EOW! If she has a surname, it must be Eow.
That was back then. Now, hardly 3 weeks later, she has become a manja miaow. You can easily tangkap her.
She's a small thing, really. Can cuddle her up into a ball.
Oh, shit...
Bath time! The first time she went to take a bath, she was made a huge racket! EEEEEOOOOOOOWWWW!! EEEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWW!! Claws all come out.
Now, when she takes a bath... Not a mew!
After she's shampoo-ed, she does it her way.
Finally done, feeling like a million bucks.
Small, cute thing. She even sleeps with Mei Yee on her bed. But she's real smart, for a kitten. She does not poo on her bed. In fact, she does not poo anywhere else. She does it in the yellow litter box. Then, she buries the poo herself. And she's careful enough to not step on any of her poo.
She likes humans...
And warm, enclosed spaces too...
I can't believe I talk to kittens nowadays...
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Scary is the way that leads to life
There are few things that are scarier than a teacher who calls you out by name, marks your book in front of you, and gives you instant correctional instructions. If you didn't do your work, you squirm in your pants and face the music.
True or not?
There are fewer things that are scarier than a teacher who meticulously keeps records on a name list. If you have not done what you were told, you just know that you can't escape. It's only a matter a time. If it's not today, it's tomorrow. Better do it before tomorrow.
True or not?
Even scarier is a teacher commends you rightfully without overdoing it, and rebukes you reasonably without pulling punches. You know he is not dishing out compliments just to gain rapport, and he is not scolding you just because he wants to release his temper.
True or not?
It's a new revelation. Students look for a teacher who says what he means, and does what he says.
If you say "buat semua soalan" but you do not mark them, the students know you are not serious.
If you give instructions to the class and you don't have a name list, the students know you are bluffing.
If you don't affirm or rebuke students at the right time, the students know you are not in control of them.
"Aren't those kind of stuff merely basic classroom management?" You may ask.
You think every teacher actually does it meh... Where got...
He who marks books, keeps lists and talks straight will become Guru Cemerlang.
Actually very simple only, hor...
True or not?
There are fewer things that are scarier than a teacher who meticulously keeps records on a name list. If you have not done what you were told, you just know that you can't escape. It's only a matter a time. If it's not today, it's tomorrow. Better do it before tomorrow.
True or not?
Even scarier is a teacher commends you rightfully without overdoing it, and rebukes you reasonably without pulling punches. You know he is not dishing out compliments just to gain rapport, and he is not scolding you just because he wants to release his temper.
True or not?
It's a new revelation. Students look for a teacher who says what he means, and does what he says.
If you say "buat semua soalan" but you do not mark them, the students know you are not serious.
If you give instructions to the class and you don't have a name list, the students know you are bluffing.
If you don't affirm or rebuke students at the right time, the students know you are not in control of them.
"Aren't those kind of stuff merely basic classroom management?" You may ask.
You think every teacher actually does it meh... Where got...
He who marks books, keeps lists and talks straight will become Guru Cemerlang.
Actually very simple only, hor...
Friday, January 11, 2008
Calculator monopoly
Popular Bookstores at Jaya are having a moving out sale. Prices are knocked off up to 70%! Go have a look. Popular has never been this cheap!
Calculators are going for discounted prices.
I'm collecting a fund to buy up all their calculators. And give them away to deserving students in my school.
At RM50, you can put a tool in the hands of a kid to help him/her to count. Or eke a passing grade.
Any extra proceeds will be used to buy compulsory Math workbooks for the students. My students are supposed to buy a Longman workbook, but not everybody can afford to be quick with their cash to buy one. I can get workbooks for them at bulk supply at heavily discounted prices.
Top scorers in the first monthly test who don't have calculators will get a calculator as their prize. (The term "top scorer" in SMK Selayang Bharu means the highest marks among all the failing marks. In other words, the one-eyed jack who is king among the blind. These one-eyed jacks are the ones that need more motivation. Considering they tried to count using their 8 fingers, 2 thumbs, and 10 toes, they should be given a chance to do much better. I don't wanna press my luck and see if they can use the same tools to solve trigo.)
I wanna combat number illiteracy. Help me help them.
If you are interested to be part of the cause, drop me a line at johaste@yahoo.com. Donors will be informed about the beneficiaries of their generosity. A detailed report will be emailed to you.
Thank you.
*The sale at Popular goes on until Sunday.
Calculators are going for discounted prices.
I'm collecting a fund to buy up all their calculators. And give them away to deserving students in my school.
At RM50, you can put a tool in the hands of a kid to help him/her to count. Or eke a passing grade.
Any extra proceeds will be used to buy compulsory Math workbooks for the students. My students are supposed to buy a Longman workbook, but not everybody can afford to be quick with their cash to buy one. I can get workbooks for them at bulk supply at heavily discounted prices.
Top scorers in the first monthly test who don't have calculators will get a calculator as their prize. (The term "top scorer" in SMK Selayang Bharu means the highest marks among all the failing marks. In other words, the one-eyed jack who is king among the blind. These one-eyed jacks are the ones that need more motivation. Considering they tried to count using their 8 fingers, 2 thumbs, and 10 toes, they should be given a chance to do much better. I don't wanna press my luck and see if they can use the same tools to solve trigo.)
I wanna combat number illiteracy. Help me help them.
If you are interested to be part of the cause, drop me a line at johaste@yahoo.com. Donors will be informed about the beneficiaries of their generosity. A detailed report will be emailed to you.
Thank you.
*The sale at Popular goes on until Sunday.
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
I spy with my little eye...
The first rule of Hindraf is... You don't speak about Hindraf.
The second rule of Hindraf is... You don't speak about Hindraf.
The third rule of Hindraf is... You don't speak about Hindraf.
1st from left: New member. Smiling smiling.
2nd from left: Mr. Raman. Just released from ISA.
3rd from left: Pn. S. Branch leader, giving briefing. Full name and face not disclosed.
4th from left: Pn. Meera. Just promoted from afternoon branch to morning branch by Uthayakumar.
5th from left: Pn. Malathi. "Thank God... All is fine..."
Introducing... The Terror.
One day, I want to hold what he is holding.
Introducing... The Power.
No, she is not the Pengetua. She is Kak Rom, the kerani. With one stroke of a pen, she can mess up your gaji.
She can turn you from this:
Into this:
Not even the Pengetua can do that.
Case file: Suicide morning.
Location: Above Chinese medicine stall.
Time: 0715 hours.
The alleged Indonesian maid was seen standing on the ledge of the balcony yesterday. Left hand side.
Finally, this is Sunshine.
Vehicle for undercover narcotics, Selayang division. Catch drug addict students, put inside.
The second rule of Hindraf is... You don't speak about Hindraf.
The third rule of Hindraf is... You don't speak about Hindraf.
1st from left: New member. Smiling smiling.
2nd from left: Mr. Raman. Just released from ISA.
3rd from left: Pn. S. Branch leader, giving briefing. Full name and face not disclosed.
4th from left: Pn. Meera. Just promoted from afternoon branch to morning branch by Uthayakumar.
5th from left: Pn. Malathi. "Thank God... All is fine..."
* * * * * * * * * *
Introducing... The Terror.
One day, I want to hold what he is holding.
* * * * * * * * * *
Introducing... The Power.
No, she is not the Pengetua. She is Kak Rom, the kerani. With one stroke of a pen, she can mess up your gaji.
She can turn you from this:
Into this:
Not even the Pengetua can do that.
* * * * * * * * * *
Case file: Suicide morning.
Location: Above Chinese medicine stall.
Time: 0715 hours.
The alleged Indonesian maid was seen standing on the ledge of the balcony yesterday. Left hand side.
* * * * * * * * * *
Finally, this is Sunshine.
Vehicle for undercover narcotics, Selayang division. Catch drug addict students, put inside.
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
Lessons from dy/dx
Joshua Johnson reminded me of a quote I came up with during my university years, which I printed out on yellow paper and pasted on the wall in my hostel room:
Mantra for highly busy individuals. May be sold on a bookmark in Evangel bookstores one day. Hehehe...
Differentiate...
Between what you need and what you want
God give me strength
to do what I need
The courage
to want the right things
And the wisdom
to differentiate between the two
Between what you need and what you want
God give me strength
to do what I need
The courage
to want the right things
And the wisdom
to differentiate between the two
Mantra for highly busy individuals. May be sold on a bookmark in Evangel bookstores one day. Hehehe...
* * * * * * * * * *
AGM today for Kelab Renang. Only 1 boy turned up.
Bagusss... Bagusss...
Then 21 more turned up.
Ummm... Bagus? :P
Oh well. I guess it's gonna be a go.
I suddenly felt motivated to do the club. Dunno why. It's a strange thing.
Kelab Fotografi. Finally got the camera passed on to me. It will be in my care for the rest of the year. To be used at my disposal. Olympus C-760, 3.2 Megapixels, 10x optical zoom.
Suddenly I felt motivated to become snap happy. Dunno why. It's an unexplained phenomenon.
Imagine the kind of crimes I can catch on camera. And put it on my blog...
The Form 4's finally got their classes today, after being cooped up in the hall since Thursday last week.
"Cikgu, ini kelas paling belakang kah?"
"Ya, ini memang kelas paling belakang sekali!"
A chinese girl starting crying.
They don't look so bad after all. My new persona is working.
I suddenly felt motivated to become a good form teacher. Hard. Tough. No nonsense. But sincere. Think Von Trapp. Captain Von Trapp.
* * * * * * * * * *
Ok. First picture with school camera.
Is it ok to bring bread to school with bak kua inside?
Bagusss... Bagusss...
Then 21 more turned up.
Ummm... Bagus? :P
Oh well. I guess it's gonna be a go.
I suddenly felt motivated to do the club. Dunno why. It's a strange thing.
* * * * * * * * * *
Kelab Fotografi. Finally got the camera passed on to me. It will be in my care for the rest of the year. To be used at my disposal. Olympus C-760, 3.2 Megapixels, 10x optical zoom.
Suddenly I felt motivated to become snap happy. Dunno why. It's an unexplained phenomenon.
Imagine the kind of crimes I can catch on camera. And put it on my blog...
* * * * * * * * * *
The Form 4's finally got their classes today, after being cooped up in the hall since Thursday last week.
"Cikgu, ini kelas paling belakang kah?"
"Ya, ini memang kelas paling belakang sekali!"
A chinese girl starting crying.
They don't look so bad after all. My new persona is working.
I suddenly felt motivated to become a good form teacher. Hard. Tough. No nonsense. But sincere. Think Von Trapp. Captain Von Trapp.
* * * * * * * * * *
Ok. First picture with school camera.
Is it ok to bring bread to school with bak kua inside?
Monday, January 07, 2008
Drugs and suicide before breakfast
I was driving to school this morning. Along the way, I saw two boys, blowing white clouds of smoke into the air. It can't be cigarette smoke. Ganja? Syahbu? It must be one of those stuff. Ciggie smoke doesn't make billowy, white clouds of smoke.
I slowed down as I passed them. I saw my school's emblem on their ties.
I stopped the car, got down, and stopped them. The acted as though I wasn't there. Their faces were ghastly pale.
I got into my car again, passed them again, and took a good look at their faces. Two Malay boys. Faces ghostly white. Must be in Form 3 or Form 4.
Just as I was parking my car, my mind racing on my next course of action... I looked opposite my school... At the balcony above the Chinese medicine shop... And I saw...
An Indonesian maid, standing on the balcony's ledge, screaming... Wanting to jump!
What a way to start the week.
The two drug junkies did not turn up at school, of course. The school counselor said if the school caught them, they will be sent for counseling. If the Anti Dadah Kebangsaan caught them, they will be sent to Program Jati Diri. If the police caught them, they will be sent to Pemulihan Akhlak.
What about rehab?
Nope. That will take a court order... Must produce evidence... Yada yada. Too much hassle.
What should I do next time, if I were to catch drug junkies red-handed?
The answer I got was, let the police deal with it. Because they may get aggressive when they are high on drugs. They may have sharp objects or weapons under their shirt. You may put your life in danger. They may recognize your car and have their revenge.
Feel helpless yet? Frustrated? Worried?
How would I handle it differently?
Ambush them from behind. Give one of them a hard, full-swing slap. Follow through with a backhand slap on the other. While they are still dazed, strong-arm them from behind. Drag them into my car. Drive them to the police station along the street, adjacent to my school.
What... You think inviting them into the car and going for a drink would work?
But is such an unconventional intervention called for? Is it even worth it? To put your own life on the line to help two boys from getting consumed by the hellfire of drugs?
Pn Malathi said, "From the first time I saw you, I always thought you looked like Superman. maybe you should write an essay, 'The day I wished I was Superman.' "
Not accurate. A Messiah syndrome, I have not.
Mei Yee says I am like Nathan Petrelli. A public personality on the outside. But on the inside, he is cold, cruel, and driven by a selfish agenda.
Her assessment must be more accurate. Since she is the only human being who spends the most time with me.
But for me, I'd prefer to have this alter ego:
I slowed down as I passed them. I saw my school's emblem on their ties.
I stopped the car, got down, and stopped them. The acted as though I wasn't there. Their faces were ghastly pale.
I got into my car again, passed them again, and took a good look at their faces. Two Malay boys. Faces ghostly white. Must be in Form 3 or Form 4.
Just as I was parking my car, my mind racing on my next course of action... I looked opposite my school... At the balcony above the Chinese medicine shop... And I saw...
An Indonesian maid, standing on the balcony's ledge, screaming... Wanting to jump!
What a way to start the week.
The two drug junkies did not turn up at school, of course. The school counselor said if the school caught them, they will be sent for counseling. If the Anti Dadah Kebangsaan caught them, they will be sent to Program Jati Diri. If the police caught them, they will be sent to Pemulihan Akhlak.
What about rehab?
Nope. That will take a court order... Must produce evidence... Yada yada. Too much hassle.
What should I do next time, if I were to catch drug junkies red-handed?
The answer I got was, let the police deal with it. Because they may get aggressive when they are high on drugs. They may have sharp objects or weapons under their shirt. You may put your life in danger. They may recognize your car and have their revenge.
Feel helpless yet? Frustrated? Worried?
How would I handle it differently?
Ambush them from behind. Give one of them a hard, full-swing slap. Follow through with a backhand slap on the other. While they are still dazed, strong-arm them from behind. Drag them into my car. Drive them to the police station along the street, adjacent to my school.
What... You think inviting them into the car and going for a drink would work?
But is such an unconventional intervention called for? Is it even worth it? To put your own life on the line to help two boys from getting consumed by the hellfire of drugs?
Pn Malathi said, "From the first time I saw you, I always thought you looked like Superman. maybe you should write an essay, 'The day I wished I was Superman.' "
Not accurate. A Messiah syndrome, I have not.
Mei Yee says I am like Nathan Petrelli. A public personality on the outside. But on the inside, he is cold, cruel, and driven by a selfish agenda.
Her assessment must be more accurate. Since she is the only human being who spends the most time with me.
But for me, I'd prefer to have this alter ego:
Sunday, January 06, 2008
Christ is winsome...
...but my church is not.
I find it hard to reconcile the fact that Christ is winsome to many a sinner, but my church is not winsome to believers.
How come people don't step into my church and leave saying, "Wow! I'll be coming back for more!" But I hear all kinds of fantastic comments about how wonderful church services are elsewhere.
Maybe it's the sign of the times. People are generally not interested in church anymore. That's what I commonly hear.
But maybe we don't have to blame the world. We can just look at ourselves. A drop in interest in church is not wholly because the world is getting increasingly evil. It is not the world. It is the church. My church. It is just plainly not winsome. If its own members drag their feet to come, what more believers from other churches.
I don't hear the young being enthusiastic about church. And I don't see the old getting any younger.
I don't hear people changing membership to come to a Brethren church. But I hear people from the Brethren church leaving for other churches. And they say they have grown much better elsewhere.
I don't hear people saying that my church has something to offer that other churches have not. But I hear people saying how much other churches have done wonders to their lives. I hear people saying "My wife has grown out from the Brethren church."
I don't hear people praising my church for the good work it has been doing for the community. But I hear people comparing my church to a house with an uptight landlady who keeps you stifled in a musty room.
I don't hear my church producing missionaries who are confident enough to step out in faith, because the church stands right behind them. But I hear other churches sending out missionaries like Indonesia sending out Indonesian maids.
I hear people suggesting that I should leave my church. Because I can grow much better elsewhere. Because I have proven myself inter-denominationally before. Because I should not think I am undispensible. Because I should not be resting proudly on my reputation in my own church. Because I should not stop God from leading me to where He wants me to go. Because I should step out in faith. Because God can use me anywhere. Because I should not rely only on what I know and am comfortable of. Because I should learn to let go, before God can use me for greater things.
To all that, I have this to say:
I am selfish.
You see, I am thinking of my own position in eternity. I am on a get-rich-quick scheme. Not on earth, but in heaven. I've given up wanting to get rich here on earth. I'm banking all my chips in heaven. Permit me to be selfish enough to get myself to the other world.
My church, although stuffy, musty and stifling to some, is to me a place rich with opportunities to serve the Living God. Richer than anywhere else I know. If I were to throw it all away and go elsewhere, seeking "greener churches", I will make myself to be a fool. What greater honour is there, than to serve an Almighty God right where I am? What greater treasure is there, than the rewards of serving Him?
My church is so lousy? That is exactly why I am here. My church is not winsome? That is exactly why I am sticking around.
I have more than enough opportunities to serve right where I am. I have lots of things to do for my church, lots of responsibilities to carry, lots of plans, and lots of dreams for it.
I fail to see any reason why I should leave my church and start elsewhere from zero. Because there is no time left to start from zero. I wanna be on a fast track to heaven. I don't want to be distracted or delayed by the transitions of moving.
So brethren... If you hear me talking negatively about my church, it is because I am expressing what I long for the church to become - not what it currently is, but to be to all that it can be, and to be much better than it already is.
I know why I am where I am, and I know what God has called me to.
Brothers and sisters from other churches... If you give me even a slightest hint that I should leave my church... I scramble my mind to find the most fitting words to say... The best I can come up with is this:
"Get behind me, Satan."
I find it hard to reconcile the fact that Christ is winsome to many a sinner, but my church is not winsome to believers.
How come people don't step into my church and leave saying, "Wow! I'll be coming back for more!" But I hear all kinds of fantastic comments about how wonderful church services are elsewhere.
Maybe it's the sign of the times. People are generally not interested in church anymore. That's what I commonly hear.
But maybe we don't have to blame the world. We can just look at ourselves. A drop in interest in church is not wholly because the world is getting increasingly evil. It is not the world. It is the church. My church. It is just plainly not winsome. If its own members drag their feet to come, what more believers from other churches.
I don't hear the young being enthusiastic about church. And I don't see the old getting any younger.
I don't hear people changing membership to come to a Brethren church. But I hear people from the Brethren church leaving for other churches. And they say they have grown much better elsewhere.
I don't hear people saying that my church has something to offer that other churches have not. But I hear people saying how much other churches have done wonders to their lives. I hear people saying "My wife has grown out from the Brethren church."
I don't hear people praising my church for the good work it has been doing for the community. But I hear people comparing my church to a house with an uptight landlady who keeps you stifled in a musty room.
I don't hear my church producing missionaries who are confident enough to step out in faith, because the church stands right behind them. But I hear other churches sending out missionaries like Indonesia sending out Indonesian maids.
I hear people suggesting that I should leave my church. Because I can grow much better elsewhere. Because I have proven myself inter-denominationally before. Because I should not think I am undispensible. Because I should not be resting proudly on my reputation in my own church. Because I should not stop God from leading me to where He wants me to go. Because I should step out in faith. Because God can use me anywhere. Because I should not rely only on what I know and am comfortable of. Because I should learn to let go, before God can use me for greater things.
To all that, I have this to say:
I am selfish.
You see, I am thinking of my own position in eternity. I am on a get-rich-quick scheme. Not on earth, but in heaven. I've given up wanting to get rich here on earth. I'm banking all my chips in heaven. Permit me to be selfish enough to get myself to the other world.
My church, although stuffy, musty and stifling to some, is to me a place rich with opportunities to serve the Living God. Richer than anywhere else I know. If I were to throw it all away and go elsewhere, seeking "greener churches", I will make myself to be a fool. What greater honour is there, than to serve an Almighty God right where I am? What greater treasure is there, than the rewards of serving Him?
My church is so lousy? That is exactly why I am here. My church is not winsome? That is exactly why I am sticking around.
I have more than enough opportunities to serve right where I am. I have lots of things to do for my church, lots of responsibilities to carry, lots of plans, and lots of dreams for it.
I fail to see any reason why I should leave my church and start elsewhere from zero. Because there is no time left to start from zero. I wanna be on a fast track to heaven. I don't want to be distracted or delayed by the transitions of moving.
So brethren... If you hear me talking negatively about my church, it is because I am expressing what I long for the church to become - not what it currently is, but to be to all that it can be, and to be much better than it already is.
I know why I am where I am, and I know what God has called me to.
Brothers and sisters from other churches... If you give me even a slightest hint that I should leave my church... I scramble my mind to find the most fitting words to say... The best I can come up with is this:
"Get behind me, Satan."
Something snails can't do
Imagine... If I can shift house. To Kepong... That will mean...
That will also mean...
Oooops, my house? I mean... Meng Wah's house. Hehehehe...
Please let it happen... Pleeeeease... Pleeeease... I'll pray until my eyeballs go inside the eye socket... Cross my fingers until they become crooked...
- No more traveling 20 minutes to church. It could be a 5-minute dash with my bicycle.
- No more traveling 40 minutes to Taman Paramount. Less chances of falling asleep on the wheel.
- No more driving for 2 hours in a day. Jimat petrol, no need to service kereta so fast.
- No more little kids riding bicycles around the corridor. And screaming as they fly by.
- No more lugging my bicycle up 10 flights of stairs every day.
- No more difficult access to pork.
- No more worrying that someone will break into my mailbox and curi my Creation magazine.
- No more crazy suggestion to do Ah Long duty and collect maintenance fees from the tenants on the same floor.
That will also mean...
- Can host Young Adults meetings at my house.
- Can go to church for multiple meetings easily.
- Can have valid reason to transfer out of SMK Selayang Bharu.
- Can have a chance to teach in a school in Kepong.
- Can teach in an area where more people are interested in academic pursuit.
- Can live in an area where you don't look and sound like an alien from China.
- Can check my letterbox and be confident that my mail will be there.
- Can live in an area where a lots of old people can be seen walking around in the morning, going to market, etc.
- Can find food apart from nasi kandar, nasi paprik, tomyam campur, burger...
- Can live in a house at a flat's rental rate.
- Can park my car in my house.
- Can park my bicycle in my house.
- Can have air-cond in my house.
- Can have washing machine in my house.
- Can keep more things neatly in the kitchen cabinets in my house.
Oooops, my house? I mean... Meng Wah's house. Hehehehe...
Please let it happen... Pleeeeease... Pleeeease... I'll pray until my eyeballs go inside the eye socket... Cross my fingers until they become crooked...
Friday, January 04, 2008
When Mathematicians have nothing to do...
Jumlah hari persekolahan termasuk cuti am = 207.
Jumlah hari cuti penggal = 84.
Which job lets you work slightly more than half a year, every year?
Which job lets you work half a day, every day?
Which job gives you almost 3 months' worth of holidays?
On top of all that, which job also gives you medical leaves and Cuti Rehat Khas?
1 week has an average of 970 teaching minutes.
1 day has an average of 194 teaching minutes.
That's 3.23 hours of teaching per day.
That's 64.67 teaching hours per month.
If you count the pay based on teaching hours...
That's RM38.69 per hour. Fresh graduate rate.
Aku guru Malaysia!
Jumlah hari cuti penggal = 84.
Which job lets you work slightly more than half a year, every year?
Which job lets you work half a day, every day?
Which job gives you almost 3 months' worth of holidays?
On top of all that, which job also gives you medical leaves and Cuti Rehat Khas?
1 week has an average of 970 teaching minutes.
1 day has an average of 194 teaching minutes.
That's 3.23 hours of teaching per day.
That's 64.67 teaching hours per month.
If you count the pay based on teaching hours...
That's RM38.69 per hour. Fresh graduate rate.
Aku guru Malaysia!
Throat infection
No class since first day of school. Form 4's are still undergoing streaming. Will continue until Monday next week. Tuesday only start teaching.
Bagusss...
Penolong Kanan HEM released me from being Penyelaras Form 4.
Bagusss... Bagusss...
Pn. N said I can let go of the Fotografi thing for the school magazine. And be in charge of magazine distribution instead.
Lagi bagusss...
Fellow Math teachers agreed to use workbooks instead of textbooks. Form 4 Maths classes will be using Longman. Form 4 Add Maths will be using Pelangi. If you are a book salesman, and if you want my school to use your books... You know who to talk to :P
Bessst...
Now waiting for the clinic to reopen, to see the doctor. So I can sing louder next Monday.
NEGAAARAAAKUUUUUUU!!
Bagusss...
Penolong Kanan HEM released me from being Penyelaras Form 4.
Bagusss... Bagusss...
Pn. N said I can let go of the Fotografi thing for the school magazine. And be in charge of magazine distribution instead.
Lagi bagusss...
Fellow Math teachers agreed to use workbooks instead of textbooks. Form 4 Maths classes will be using Longman. Form 4 Add Maths will be using Pelangi. If you are a book salesman, and if you want my school to use your books... You know who to talk to :P
Bessst...
Now waiting for the clinic to reopen, to see the doctor. So I can sing louder next Monday.
NEGAAARAAAKUUUUUUU!!
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
Guru Cemerlang on the loose
Tomorrow's the first day of school. I think I feel worse than a student.
Tomorrow, SMK Selayang Bharu will see a new Cikgu Joshua.
Tomorrow, I am no longer a new junior.
Tomorrow, I will be one year senior.
Tomorrow, I will bring a chain in my pocket.
Tomorrow, I will sing the Negaraku at the top of my lungs.
And the state anthem as well:
Stay tuned for updates.
Tomorrow, SMK Selayang Bharu will see a new Cikgu Joshua.
Tomorrow, I am no longer a new junior.
Tomorrow, I will be one year senior.
Tomorrow, I will bring a chain in my pocket.
Tomorrow, I will sing the Negaraku at the top of my lungs.
And the state anthem as well:
Duli Yang Maha Mulia
Selamat di atas takhta
Allah lanjutkan usia Tuanku
Rakyat mohon restu
Atas Duli Tuanku
Bahagia selama-lamanya
Aman dan sentosa
Duli Yang Mahaaaaaaaaa....
Muliaaaaaaaaaaa....
Selamat di atas takhta
Allah lanjutkan usia Tuanku
Rakyat mohon restu
Atas Duli Tuanku
Bahagia selama-lamanya
Aman dan sentosa
Duli Yang Mahaaaaaaaaa....
Muliaaaaaaaaaaa....
Stay tuned for updates.
For richer or poorer
Don't you think it's strange... That you seem to be richer when you were a student? I thought it was the other way around. Now that I'm working, I seem to be nearer to the poverty line!
When I was a student, I was living on a scholarship. Added with RM300 from my father's monthly allowance, I was eating like a king. Easily a red dollar bill per meal. Sometimes even more, after a workout in the pool.
Now, I'm scrimping every dollar on food. Skipping lunches every once in a while. Hogging freebies every jamuan when I can.
I had a dream of becoming a triathlete last year. After a while, I realized it will remain just as a dream. No funding for body fuel.
It got me thinking about my father. He was just a school teacher like me. Sole bread winner. How did he find the means to raise my family?
He had 3 jobs.
I hear ikut skema people saying it's not right for government servants to hold more than one job. Well, if my father ikut skema, I wouldn't have had the opportunities to train to be a swimmer, would I? I wouldn't have made it to the national championships, I wouldn't have made it to Sukma, I wouldn't have become a lifeguard, I wouldn't have become a national lifesaver, I wouldn't have represented my country in Japan, nor participated in the World Championships in Australia, would I?
The money involved just to give me a proper nutrition would've been sufficient to raise 4 kids in Selayang.
Trust me. My family was not the spendrift type. My father drove old cars all his life. We lived in rented houses and flats until I hit secondary school. The house that my father finally managed to buy was a humble one, not more than a hundred grand. If cars and houses are the things that determine your status, my father had nothing much to show.
He never pampered himself with anything luxurious. His clothes have the sole purpose of covering his body decently enough to get to work. Discounts in Sunshine Square appeal more to him than brands.
Thinking back, he must've loved me a lot. The amount of hard work he put in just to fund my nutrition for swimming... And seeing me through my entire education, which in total, did not amount any more than 2 grand in fees... He couldn't have done it with only one job.
Yet I hear ikut skema people saying why it is not ethical for government servants to hold more than one job. Probably, people who ikut skema can afford to ikut skema because they are affluent enough to ikut skema.
Well, anyway... I've digressed.
I learned that it is impossible to serve both God and mammon. Jesus was right.
The world's values are totally in conflict with the heavenly kingdom's values. The work you do for the world will give you money. The work for the Lord won't give you a cent.
But here's the thing. The world's rewards in monetary terms will last you no longer than your stay on earth. The heavenly kingdom's rewards start the moment you end your stay on earth, and stretches for eternity.
So, you have 24 hours a day. If you put all your time to work for the world, you will get a lot of money on earth. If you put all your time to work for the heavenly kingdom, you won't get a cent here. Which will it be? Broke on earth, or broke in heaven?
Therefore, the "smart" thing to do is to find the best possible balance between the two... The delicate line that keeps you alive on earth, while you do your best for the kingdom.
But here's the other thing. The same Person who said you cannot serve both God and mammon also said these things:
"Again, the kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and hid; and for joy over it he goes and sells all that he has and buys the field."
"Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking beautiful pearls, who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had and bought it." (Matthew 13:44-46)
He didn't say anything about "finding that delicate line between the two." He said "sell all".
It's like a cosmic gamble. If you believe Him, you put all your chips with Him. Then you cross your fingers really hard. And you hope He'd better be right.
But you still cant run away from the fact that you want money. In those deep, dark moments... You secretly wish you can be rich... And hush hush yourself for such a shameful wish.
I heard this song on the radio once:
Shamelessly blatant and funny! That song rings in my head at night. And I chuckle to myself before I sleep.
When I was a student, I was living on a scholarship. Added with RM300 from my father's monthly allowance, I was eating like a king. Easily a red dollar bill per meal. Sometimes even more, after a workout in the pool.
Now, I'm scrimping every dollar on food. Skipping lunches every once in a while. Hogging freebies every jamuan when I can.
I had a dream of becoming a triathlete last year. After a while, I realized it will remain just as a dream. No funding for body fuel.
It got me thinking about my father. He was just a school teacher like me. Sole bread winner. How did he find the means to raise my family?
He had 3 jobs.
I hear ikut skema people saying it's not right for government servants to hold more than one job. Well, if my father ikut skema, I wouldn't have had the opportunities to train to be a swimmer, would I? I wouldn't have made it to the national championships, I wouldn't have made it to Sukma, I wouldn't have become a lifeguard, I wouldn't have become a national lifesaver, I wouldn't have represented my country in Japan, nor participated in the World Championships in Australia, would I?
The money involved just to give me a proper nutrition would've been sufficient to raise 4 kids in Selayang.
Trust me. My family was not the spendrift type. My father drove old cars all his life. We lived in rented houses and flats until I hit secondary school. The house that my father finally managed to buy was a humble one, not more than a hundred grand. If cars and houses are the things that determine your status, my father had nothing much to show.
He never pampered himself with anything luxurious. His clothes have the sole purpose of covering his body decently enough to get to work. Discounts in Sunshine Square appeal more to him than brands.
Thinking back, he must've loved me a lot. The amount of hard work he put in just to fund my nutrition for swimming... And seeing me through my entire education, which in total, did not amount any more than 2 grand in fees... He couldn't have done it with only one job.
Yet I hear ikut skema people saying why it is not ethical for government servants to hold more than one job. Probably, people who ikut skema can afford to ikut skema because they are affluent enough to ikut skema.
Well, anyway... I've digressed.
I learned that it is impossible to serve both God and mammon. Jesus was right.
The world's values are totally in conflict with the heavenly kingdom's values. The work you do for the world will give you money. The work for the Lord won't give you a cent.
But here's the thing. The world's rewards in monetary terms will last you no longer than your stay on earth. The heavenly kingdom's rewards start the moment you end your stay on earth, and stretches for eternity.
So, you have 24 hours a day. If you put all your time to work for the world, you will get a lot of money on earth. If you put all your time to work for the heavenly kingdom, you won't get a cent here. Which will it be? Broke on earth, or broke in heaven?
Therefore, the "smart" thing to do is to find the best possible balance between the two... The delicate line that keeps you alive on earth, while you do your best for the kingdom.
But here's the other thing. The same Person who said you cannot serve both God and mammon also said these things:
"Again, the kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and hid; and for joy over it he goes and sells all that he has and buys the field."
"Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking beautiful pearls, who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had and bought it." (Matthew 13:44-46)
He didn't say anything about "finding that delicate line between the two." He said "sell all".
It's like a cosmic gamble. If you believe Him, you put all your chips with Him. Then you cross your fingers really hard. And you hope He'd better be right.
But you still cant run away from the fact that you want money. In those deep, dark moments... You secretly wish you can be rich... And hush hush yourself for such a shameful wish.
I heard this song on the radio once:
Shamelessly blatant and funny! That song rings in my head at night. And I chuckle to myself before I sleep.
New year reflections
Oh my gosh!!
Do you remember this cartoon?
Tell me if you're not smiling yet.
Don't you wish you can just go back?
Sigh...
Happy new year, everyone.
Do you remember this cartoon?
Tell me if you're not smiling yet.
Don't you wish you can just go back?
Sigh...
Happy new year, everyone.
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
Things You Dare Not Say About Christmas
"I thank God that Christmas is over". A daughter of a church elder said this recently. I so know what she means.
We always say Christmas is not about the gifts. It's not about the shopping. Yada yada...
Yes, this is applicable for Western countries. People buy gifts for one another during Christmas, even though they are not Christians. It is more like a holiday tradition thingy. They get caught up with shopping and gifts, and they miss out on the real meaning of Christmas.
But take a closer look at our Asian context. Do non-Christians buy gifts for one another during Christmas? Do you think your regular Lim Ah Chong and Karrupiah Munusamy went shopping for Christmas gifts for Siti Fatimah and Santokh Singh? No.
Even if they may be out shopping, it is because of the discount. Not for the gift exchange.
Let's get real. Who are the ones who are really caught up with the shopping? It is not the non-Christians. It is the Christians who get worked up about what gifts to buy for one another.
So why are we telling non-Christians that Christmas is not about the shopping? We are telling the wrong audience.
We say Christmas is a time of remembering the birth of Christ. We should not lose sight of it in the midst of the hustle and bustle of Christmas, yada yada...
But who are the ones who are busiest during Christmas? It is not the non-Christians. It is the Christians who get the most stressed up during this time of year. Presentations. Musicals. Christmas rallies. Caroling. You wanna tell people that Christmas is about one Silent Night? You should be telling the Christians.
Ho ho ho. Such is the irony of Christmas.
We always say Christmas is not about the gifts. It's not about the shopping. Yada yada...
Yes, this is applicable for Western countries. People buy gifts for one another during Christmas, even though they are not Christians. It is more like a holiday tradition thingy. They get caught up with shopping and gifts, and they miss out on the real meaning of Christmas.
But take a closer look at our Asian context. Do non-Christians buy gifts for one another during Christmas? Do you think your regular Lim Ah Chong and Karrupiah Munusamy went shopping for Christmas gifts for Siti Fatimah and Santokh Singh? No.
Even if they may be out shopping, it is because of the discount. Not for the gift exchange.
Let's get real. Who are the ones who are really caught up with the shopping? It is not the non-Christians. It is the Christians who get worked up about what gifts to buy for one another.
So why are we telling non-Christians that Christmas is not about the shopping? We are telling the wrong audience.
We say Christmas is a time of remembering the birth of Christ. We should not lose sight of it in the midst of the hustle and bustle of Christmas, yada yada...
But who are the ones who are busiest during Christmas? It is not the non-Christians. It is the Christians who get the most stressed up during this time of year. Presentations. Musicals. Christmas rallies. Caroling. You wanna tell people that Christmas is about one Silent Night? You should be telling the Christians.
Ho ho ho. Such is the irony of Christmas.
Congratulations! You won a lucky draw
Telemarketers have a new tactic nowadays.
They call your house. They make you believe you won a lucky draw. And you must go to their office to get a freebie. A complementary 3 days, 2 nights stay at a hotel. A 1-month free membership in a gym. That sort of thing.
They will sit you down, give you a 40-minute marketing talk, then they hand you the freebie.
Smart. They make you think you've won something. So you don't want to waste it. But in actual fact, they're dragging you to hear their marketing pitch. At the comfort of their own office. They won't mind giving away a free 3 days, 2 nights stay because their hotel is not doing well anyway. It's better to give a free room away along with a marketing pitch, than to leave the free room empty.
One day, what if you pull off a Tom Mabe.
They call your house. They make you believe you won a lucky draw. And you must go to their office to get a freebie. A complementary 3 days, 2 nights stay at a hotel. A 1-month free membership in a gym. That sort of thing.
They will sit you down, give you a 40-minute marketing talk, then they hand you the freebie.
Smart. They make you think you've won something. So you don't want to waste it. But in actual fact, they're dragging you to hear their marketing pitch. At the comfort of their own office. They won't mind giving away a free 3 days, 2 nights stay because their hotel is not doing well anyway. It's better to give a free room away along with a marketing pitch, than to leave the free room empty.
One day, what if you pull off a Tom Mabe.
No more I love yous...
Pn. R, the Penolong Kanan Ko-k called me during the holidays. She wanted me to start a Kelab Renang. The Pengetua wants the school to be the first from Gombak to enter the state level competition.
Ok. The deal was this. Release me from PIBG. And I'll do the Kelab Renang.
I thought I'll draft out a 3-year plan. Make arrangements with the Sri Siantan pool for cheaper rates. Teach them a new skill. Introduce them to lifesaving. Give them opportunities to become qualified lifeguards. So they can have a job to do after school hours, to help make ends meet.
Sounds like a plan, huh.
Staff meeting. All 4 of my positions in school are maintained. On top of that, 5 more new positions are added.
No. 1. I am still form teacher. But of all classes, I get to be form teacher of the last class in Form 4. I bet nobody wanted it. Give it to the young guy. He can handle it.
No. 2. I am the newly appointed Penyelaras Tingkatan 4. I have the much coveted job to handle all the Form 4 registers, besides taking care of my own. 11 classes in all. I will have to process every form 4 student who comes in or leaves the school.
My name wasn't initially on that position. It was some other woman. Her name was canceled of with a stroke of a pen. And my name was written on it. "Aku tak boleh buat lah. Bagi Joshua lah." Seniors choose. Juniors do.
No. 3. Yes, I'm still in the Lembaga Disiplin. In charge of the Sistem Merit Demerit.
No. 4. Yes, I'm still in the PIBG. AJK Guru.
No. 5. New post. Kelab Guru & Staf Sokongan (KGSS). AJK.
That's 5 administrative positions.
Now let's go to the co-curricular ones.
No. 6. Kelab Fotografi. "You pegang saja kamera ini. Pelajar yang buat kerja. Kalau pegang fotografi, boleh cepat naik."
Yah, you think I was born yesterday, Pn. N. If it's so simple, why don't you pegang it yourself? Everyone says the work is sikit saja, sikit saja. Well, a lot of sikits will make a bukits, no?
Kalau nak naik, ada banyak cara. One of them is being good in the classroom, no?
No. 7. School magazine. I am the AJK Fotografi Pagi. Since I am in the kelab Fotografi, I am in the school magazine as well by proxy. It's the whole she-bang.
No. 8. Rumah Mat Kilau (yellow house).
No. 9. Kelab Renang. Start the club.
I learnt that there is actually no communication between the different departments. The Penolong Kanan Ko-k will give you work for her purposes. The Penolong Kanan Hal Ehwal Murid will give you work for her purposes. Both heads don't communicate their plans with one another.
If I were to ask the Pengetua if she can look up some random teacher's name, and tell me what positions he/she is holding, I don't think she can do that. Because if she can, she does not need us to list down all our duties each year for our Penilaian Tahunan, does she? That's how people end up with 9 positions in a year. That's how people have posts that you never even heard of, and get points for it by the end of the year.
Here's what I'm gonna do.
I'm going to tell the Penolong Kanan Ko-k, "Pn N, no deal. Saya tak akan bergerak."
No. 1. 4 Earth. I'm gonna love you. If you can't pay your fees, I'll make you pay by installments. Take out your wallet and gimme a dollar. A dollar a day will pay your fees in 2 month's time. I don't want any trouble. I just want to get the job done.
No. 2. Penyelaras Tingkatan 4. New boy comes in. His parents cakap Cina with me, because they can't speak any other language. They don't have their documents.
"Puan, sorry ah. Please get your documents ready and come back when you or your child have learnt the lingua franca. Or else, please go to a special school.
I only process students who are fit for this school. If you are not, I cannot assimilate you into our registry system.
You know what is assimilate? It's the same word you use in food digestion. You ingest it with your mouth, you digest it in your stomach, then you assimilate it in your intestines. In other words, it's the last process before you get the shit."
No. 3. Lembaga Disiplin. If I don't like you, I'll just enter demerit points into your name without you knowing it. You'll be gone before you can say abra-selayang-bra.
No. 4. PIBG. I won't turn up. Just watch and see. Don't like it? Drop me. Please.
No. 5. KGSS. Pegang saja, kan. Ok lah. Itulah yang saya akan buat. Pegang saja. I'll show you how good I am at pegang-ing. Just pegang la. Pegang...
No. 6. Kelab Fotografi. I'll take the camera. I'll use it for my own purposes. I won't remember to bring it to school. I'm senile. Buy me Omega 3 fish oil.
No. 7. School magazine. When there's even the smallest event, I'll bring the camera, and skip class. Pergi ambil gambar.
No. 8. Mat Kilau. Go yellow!
No. 9. Kelab Renang. Very simple. I'll tell them how much it costs to enter the pool. I'll show them how much it costs to buy swimming gear. Too expensive? Sorry. It's pool rules. No gear, no swim. Nobody can afford to join? So sad....
Or, I just pull off a medical leave on AGM day. No teacher, no promo, sure no students. Apa boleh buat. Tak ada orang minat. Tak boleh ada kelab lah.
Sorry lah, SMK Selayang Bharu. Wanna play games? Let's roll!
Ok. The deal was this. Release me from PIBG. And I'll do the Kelab Renang.
I thought I'll draft out a 3-year plan. Make arrangements with the Sri Siantan pool for cheaper rates. Teach them a new skill. Introduce them to lifesaving. Give them opportunities to become qualified lifeguards. So they can have a job to do after school hours, to help make ends meet.
Sounds like a plan, huh.
Staff meeting. All 4 of my positions in school are maintained. On top of that, 5 more new positions are added.
No. 1. I am still form teacher. But of all classes, I get to be form teacher of the last class in Form 4. I bet nobody wanted it. Give it to the young guy. He can handle it.
No. 2. I am the newly appointed Penyelaras Tingkatan 4. I have the much coveted job to handle all the Form 4 registers, besides taking care of my own. 11 classes in all. I will have to process every form 4 student who comes in or leaves the school.
My name wasn't initially on that position. It was some other woman. Her name was canceled of with a stroke of a pen. And my name was written on it. "Aku tak boleh buat lah. Bagi Joshua lah." Seniors choose. Juniors do.
No. 3. Yes, I'm still in the Lembaga Disiplin. In charge of the Sistem Merit Demerit.
No. 4. Yes, I'm still in the PIBG. AJK Guru.
No. 5. New post. Kelab Guru & Staf Sokongan (KGSS). AJK.
That's 5 administrative positions.
Now let's go to the co-curricular ones.
No. 6. Kelab Fotografi. "You pegang saja kamera ini. Pelajar yang buat kerja. Kalau pegang fotografi, boleh cepat naik."
Yah, you think I was born yesterday, Pn. N. If it's so simple, why don't you pegang it yourself? Everyone says the work is sikit saja, sikit saja. Well, a lot of sikits will make a bukits, no?
Kalau nak naik, ada banyak cara. One of them is being good in the classroom, no?
No. 7. School magazine. I am the AJK Fotografi Pagi. Since I am in the kelab Fotografi, I am in the school magazine as well by proxy. It's the whole she-bang.
No. 8. Rumah Mat Kilau (yellow house).
No. 9. Kelab Renang. Start the club.
I learnt that there is actually no communication between the different departments. The Penolong Kanan Ko-k will give you work for her purposes. The Penolong Kanan Hal Ehwal Murid will give you work for her purposes. Both heads don't communicate their plans with one another.
If I were to ask the Pengetua if she can look up some random teacher's name, and tell me what positions he/she is holding, I don't think she can do that. Because if she can, she does not need us to list down all our duties each year for our Penilaian Tahunan, does she? That's how people end up with 9 positions in a year. That's how people have posts that you never even heard of, and get points for it by the end of the year.
Here's what I'm gonna do.
I'm going to tell the Penolong Kanan Ko-k, "Pn N, no deal. Saya tak akan bergerak."
No. 1. 4 Earth. I'm gonna love you. If you can't pay your fees, I'll make you pay by installments. Take out your wallet and gimme a dollar. A dollar a day will pay your fees in 2 month's time. I don't want any trouble. I just want to get the job done.
No. 2. Penyelaras Tingkatan 4. New boy comes in. His parents cakap Cina with me, because they can't speak any other language. They don't have their documents.
"Puan, sorry ah. Please get your documents ready and come back when you or your child have learnt the lingua franca. Or else, please go to a special school.
I only process students who are fit for this school. If you are not, I cannot assimilate you into our registry system.
You know what is assimilate? It's the same word you use in food digestion. You ingest it with your mouth, you digest it in your stomach, then you assimilate it in your intestines. In other words, it's the last process before you get the shit."
No. 3. Lembaga Disiplin. If I don't like you, I'll just enter demerit points into your name without you knowing it. You'll be gone before you can say abra-selayang-bra.
No. 4. PIBG. I won't turn up. Just watch and see. Don't like it? Drop me. Please.
No. 5. KGSS. Pegang saja, kan. Ok lah. Itulah yang saya akan buat. Pegang saja. I'll show you how good I am at pegang-ing. Just pegang la. Pegang...
No. 6. Kelab Fotografi. I'll take the camera. I'll use it for my own purposes. I won't remember to bring it to school. I'm senile. Buy me Omega 3 fish oil.
No. 7. School magazine. When there's even the smallest event, I'll bring the camera, and skip class. Pergi ambil gambar.
No. 8. Mat Kilau. Go yellow!
No. 9. Kelab Renang. Very simple. I'll tell them how much it costs to enter the pool. I'll show them how much it costs to buy swimming gear. Too expensive? Sorry. It's pool rules. No gear, no swim. Nobody can afford to join? So sad....
Or, I just pull off a medical leave on AGM day. No teacher, no promo, sure no students. Apa boleh buat. Tak ada orang minat. Tak boleh ada kelab lah.
Sorry lah, SMK Selayang Bharu. Wanna play games? Let's roll!
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